Last night the final three said goodbye to the back yard. Goodbye hammock. Goodbye fake grass. BB has told them they will be locking down the back yard Tuesday at 7:00 am. Goodbye pool. Goodbye hot tub.
All of these goodbyes while laying on wet astroturf to reenact last season's final three goodbye's. They share back yard memories. This takes quite a while. Cody and Victoria get a little fidgety, but Derrick is just laying under his BB sky soaking it all in. Goodbye barking spiders. (barking spiders??!!!) Goodbye ants.
They already took the last swing on the hammock. And right before that, Victoria had one last try at getting Derrick to admit he had promised her f2:
Victoria: Can you just admit?
Derrick: Admit what?
Victoria: That you said the thing...
Derrick: I said what you think I said, but my intentions were obviously different than you thought they were.
Victoria: So we never had a final two?
Derrick: I don't think we did.
Victoria: Sigh........
Goodbye weights. Goodbye couches. Goodbye pillows.
Derrick says they gotta put the cover on the pool table for the last time. I never saw them do this before. I think this is the first time they have ever used that cover. But they are caught up in a Fellini film moment as they say their last words at the pool table funeral. Cody is so sad he might just cry.
Did Derrick get a final Team America mission? A mission to:
A) creep me out, or B) make Cody cry?
Cody writes his name in the dew on the grill cover. A bird shrieks in the night. I'm getting a little freaked out here. They are all strolling around aimlessly thinking morbid goodbye thoughts. Goodbye washer. Goodbye dryer.
BB: Holla! Froot Loop Dingus!
Thank goodness Zach is here in spirit, to comfort us during the last moments of the saddest ever BB back yard memorial service.
BB scares them with a lockdown announcement. They all freak out and panic. BB announces lockdown is over. They calm down and continue with their goodbyes. They are sad, and tired, and acting pretty damn weird. Goodbye camera pole in the middle of the yard.
They finally head inside to get ready for bed. Thank gawd this nonsense is over! Then Derrick runs back outside for one last goodbye. He races over to the pool. Goodbye Ducky!
BB is playing some really weird sound over the loudspeakers. It sounds like that creepy freaky sound in that movie The Langoliers. It's freaking me the fook out! Maybe its barking spiders! Is that what they sound like?
They just ignore the sound and make a bedtime snack. I would make one too, but the lights are off in my kitchen, and I just know there are barking spiders waiting for me. And I know what they will shriek at me with that awful Langoliers barking spider sound. Goodbye Dorky!
Have a Dorky Day!
Showing posts with label Victoria Rafaeli. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Victoria Rafaeli. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
Sunday, September 21, 2014
This Final Three Is Killing Me!
The final days in the BB house are designed to make everyone go completely bonkers. The feeds get sooooooo boring, the hgs are sooooooo bored. Game talk is circular, repetitive, mind numbing. At this point in the season my skull is sloshing with a puddle of BB brain-mush.
This particular final three is seriously close to driving each other insane. Cody is cussing up a storm about everything. He is hyper to the max. He has completely lost patience with Victoria. He wants Derrick to please just make her shut the fook up! Tell her there is no hope! Squash that girl's BB dreams right this minute!
Ever since Cody outed The Hitmen during Caleb's eviction, Victoria has been a little cranky. After Derrick won part two of the final HOH, she has been on a mission to get direct answers from him about who he would take to the final two.
But she is doing it in her own special Victoria way. She hammers away at him for hours, talking so low you can barely hear her. She also speaks in sentence fragments that mostly make no sense. She wants direct answers, but rarely asks a direct question. It's driving Derrick and Cody crazy!. Me too!
I kind of want her to just start screaming at them demanding answers! I wish she would just give them hell for these final days. Victoria actually thinks she has played a good game. She has almost convinced herself that she has brought Derrick to the end with her game play. This whole Hitmen alliance business is really pissing her off.
I think she really wants to get mad, but still holds some small hope that she will be taken to the final two by one of these guys. I bet Victoria is a glorious force to be reckoned with when she is truly furious. That pink hat incident was just a tease. I want to see her spit fire and spew Hebrew! I want her to get all Victoria Princess Warrior on their asses!!! Yes, please!
Derrick tells her so many versions of why he shouldn't take her to the final two, it's no wonder the poor girl can't speak in complete sentences. But he never tells her point blank that he isn't taking her. He talks around it. He is slowly, methodically, painfully working her for a jury vote. Derrick is tricky that way.
Cody says that if Derrick doesn't tell her she has no chance of final two, he will tell her himself. He wants Victoria to stop following Derrick around. Cody just wants to have a good time being Big Brother's Most-Amazing-Secret-Alliance-Final-Two-Ever, and Victoria is ruining all of his fun! His Hitmen reveal seems to have gone to his head. He may actually follow through on this threat, if Derrick doesn't finally just tell her he is taking Cody to the end.
Meanwhile, it's hard for me to believe these guys are really not planning to take Victoria to final two. Are they lying to each other? Are they lying to us? I never get it right at the end. My brain hurts just thinking about it. My final two predictions are always completely wrong. Well, I am mostly wrong the whole season, but I am always crazy wrong in the end. BB brain-mush FTW!
Have a Dorky Day!
.
This particular final three is seriously close to driving each other insane. Cody is cussing up a storm about everything. He is hyper to the max. He has completely lost patience with Victoria. He wants Derrick to please just make her shut the fook up! Tell her there is no hope! Squash that girl's BB dreams right this minute!
Ever since Cody outed The Hitmen during Caleb's eviction, Victoria has been a little cranky. After Derrick won part two of the final HOH, she has been on a mission to get direct answers from him about who he would take to the final two.
But she is doing it in her own special Victoria way. She hammers away at him for hours, talking so low you can barely hear her. She also speaks in sentence fragments that mostly make no sense. She wants direct answers, but rarely asks a direct question. It's driving Derrick and Cody crazy!. Me too!
I kind of want her to just start screaming at them demanding answers! I wish she would just give them hell for these final days. Victoria actually thinks she has played a good game. She has almost convinced herself that she has brought Derrick to the end with her game play. This whole Hitmen alliance business is really pissing her off.
I think she really wants to get mad, but still holds some small hope that she will be taken to the final two by one of these guys. I bet Victoria is a glorious force to be reckoned with when she is truly furious. That pink hat incident was just a tease. I want to see her spit fire and spew Hebrew! I want her to get all Victoria Princess Warrior on their asses!!! Yes, please!
Derrick tells her so many versions of why he shouldn't take her to the final two, it's no wonder the poor girl can't speak in complete sentences. But he never tells her point blank that he isn't taking her. He talks around it. He is slowly, methodically, painfully working her for a jury vote. Derrick is tricky that way.
Cody says that if Derrick doesn't tell her she has no chance of final two, he will tell her himself. He wants Victoria to stop following Derrick around. Cody just wants to have a good time being Big Brother's Most-Amazing-Secret-Alliance-Final-Two-Ever, and Victoria is ruining all of his fun! His Hitmen reveal seems to have gone to his head. He may actually follow through on this threat, if Derrick doesn't finally just tell her he is taking Cody to the end.
Meanwhile, it's hard for me to believe these guys are really not planning to take Victoria to final two. Are they lying to each other? Are they lying to us? I never get it right at the end. My brain hurts just thinking about it. My final two predictions are always completely wrong. Well, I am mostly wrong the whole season, but I am always crazy wrong in the end. BB brain-mush FTW!
Have a Dorky Day!
.
Thursday, September 18, 2014
Bye Bye Caleb! Hello Final Three!!!
Caleb looked so sad when he got evicted. But then he perked right up when he saw the live audience and all those cameras! He gave Julie a flower! Not as romantic as a pickle banana, but a lovely gesture all the same. Then he posed for the cameras and blocked Julie's shot! BeastMode style!
And we are left with the final three. Cody, Derrick, and Victoria finally get the endurance comp they have been begging for all season. It was a beautiful set, with rainbow hang gliders, a beautiful sky, and all kinds of scenery. And we had wind, and rain, and lightning. And then they just kinda stood there, hanging on.
Was it just me, or was this comp pretty boring? After Victoria dropped I just lost interest. Then Derrick failed in his roundabout way of getting Cody to drop. I figured that between Derrick and Cody it didn't really matter who won, so I went to bed. I am a sad excuse for a BB blogger. Pitiful!
Cody won! Derrick and Cody were happy. Victoria was a little pissy. She asked Derrick if he had thrown the comp. He turned it around pretty quick, saying maybe he should suspect her of throwing it. Crisis averted. Then they all just sat around being the final three.
Derrick and Cody have a few quick convos about the coming comps, final two, and the fame and glory of The Hit Men alliance. Derrick and Victoria have some convos about their own secret alliance, that for some reason has no alliance name. Then I think they sort of officially make up from their fake fight, in front of Cody. Not that she would ever give Derrick her vote. No, Cody, don't you fret about that.
Meanwhile, Victoria is still worried about her hair. She and Cody talked about Amber constantly asking Victoria if she wore extensions. She starts to tell us about Ariana's hair loss, and we get fish. (CBS is still kissing Grande butt.) Anyway, she promised to show him her real hair. She keeps saying that she doesn't want anyone to see her without extensions, then she asks if they want to see. If Victoria makes it to final two, she might just reveal her hair to the jury.
She is also worried about what to wear on finale night. BB has all her nice clothes, and she is really getting ticked off about it. This girl has complained after every single nomination, comp, and ceremony, all season. Even when she was absolutely safe, she would complain or worry. Right after Caleb was evicted she started complaining about her clothes. You are in the final three!!! Stop complaining!
So now we wait for part two of the HOH comp. And then we will wait for the finale. There is a lot to be revealed on finale night. How will the hgs respond to the Team America twist? How will Team America feel about failing a mission they thought they nailed?
And if Derrick wins, what kind of crazy riot will erupt when Julie tells them that Derrick won an extra $50,000? I can picture them all now, counting on their fingers how much money Derrick won! This should be a lot of fun. But Frankie will have to be part of this reveal, damn it. He will have one more opportunity to be the star of the show. Ugh!
It will be fun when Donny's secret identity as a groundskeeper is revealed! I hope we have a close up of Caleb and Frankie when they discover that Donny got an acting gig!!! And then we have America's Favorite Player! If the planets are aligned in our favor, either Zach or Donny will win this coveted award. And that close up of Frankie, when he realizes that he hasn't won AFP, will be the icing on the cake of my BB16 finale!
Have a Dorky Day!
I
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
We Made It To The Final Four!!
Remember that guy who was on BB16? That little weasel who tried to use his celebrity sister, and some charity, to win the game? He was a real camera hog, always singing and dancing and doing stupid stuff to get attention? He was such a diva. I think he had pink hair, or maybe it was blue? And CBS kissed his glittery butt? And Julie acted like a silly fangirl when he was finally evicted? I just can't remember his name. Oh, never mind, it doesn't really matter.
So, here we are at the final four! I can't believe we made it this far. Only one more week to go! Derrick is the new HOH. Caleb and Victoria are on the block. Cody won the veto. It's looking like Caleb will be going to jury. Things could change, but I think that Derrick will make sure that Caleb goes. He's tricky that way!
Caleb is most definitely nervousing. Doing a lot of pacing. Looking very serious. Dreaming up killer speeches for the veto ceremony. He is looking worried, and a wee bit sad.
I have to say that I will be a wee bit sad if Caleb doesn't make it to final three. He has provided us with endless hours of entertainment. The first few weeks of Caleb feeds were awesome! He came up with one delusion after another, and each delusional episode required a new ridiculous costume. And he made a pickle banana!
He channeled all the scariest BB stalkers into one epic StalkMance. He gave us hours and hours of creepy stalker Amber love scenarios. Endless hours. Painful hours. Days and days of hours and hours of obsessing about Amber.
Ok, now that I have walked down memory lane with BeastMode Cowboy, I might not be too sad if he doesn't make it to final three. It might be a relief.
But then we would be left with Victoria. Yes, it's fun to wish for a crazy win for Victoria, just to show the bros a thing or two. But at least Caleb was playing the game. Of course, he did have to learn the game first, since he had no idea how BB works. Victoria seemed completely oblivious to the game for most of the season. Victoria in the final three would be a hoot for sure. It might just happen.
She is convinced she will win the endurance part of the final HOH. No doubt. Guaranteed. She told Derrick she is going to crush it. End of story. They talk about the first endurance comp, the first HOH. She tells him that she would have won that comp if it wasn't for her extensions. Turns out the extensions weighed ten pounds after they were sprayed with all that goop. And every time the log turned her upside down, they would hang down and really hurt her head Her extensions caused her so much pain that she had to drop.
Those extensions have caused her so much trouble and worry. Last night, before she washed her hair up in the HOH shower, she told Derrick all about her hair. Well, she didn't tell him why her hair fell out, that part is still a mystery. But she did explain how traumatized she was when it happened. She is still so ashamed and mortified that I can't even make fun of her.That's kind of how it's been all season. She is so odd, so ditzy, so bad at this game, and yet I kind of like her for making it this far in spite of herself.
9/17 2:45 a.m. cam 1
Here she is in the final four, and she is still so worried that the hgs know she wears extensions, that they might see her without them. After her shower she shows Derrick her real hair. She lets him touch it. Brave little princess. Maybe she needs to go to the jury house now, so she can have some privacy to get her hair ready for the finale. Run away little princess, run while you can.
9/17 3:19 a.m. cam 1
I can't wait for tonight's show, and then the endurance comp we have all been waiting for. I hope and pray that BB lets us see the rest of the comp on the feeds. It better be the endurance comp to beat all endurance comps. We deserve it. We made it to the final four! We survived!!! Live feeders FTW!
Have a Dorky Day!
So, here we are at the final four! I can't believe we made it this far. Only one more week to go! Derrick is the new HOH. Caleb and Victoria are on the block. Cody won the veto. It's looking like Caleb will be going to jury. Things could change, but I think that Derrick will make sure that Caleb goes. He's tricky that way!
Caleb is most definitely nervousing. Doing a lot of pacing. Looking very serious. Dreaming up killer speeches for the veto ceremony. He is looking worried, and a wee bit sad.
I have to say that I will be a wee bit sad if Caleb doesn't make it to final three. He has provided us with endless hours of entertainment. The first few weeks of Caleb feeds were awesome! He came up with one delusion after another, and each delusional episode required a new ridiculous costume. And he made a pickle banana!
He channeled all the scariest BB stalkers into one epic StalkMance. He gave us hours and hours of creepy stalker Amber love scenarios. Endless hours. Painful hours. Days and days of hours and hours of obsessing about Amber.
Ok, now that I have walked down memory lane with BeastMode Cowboy, I might not be too sad if he doesn't make it to final three. It might be a relief.
But then we would be left with Victoria. Yes, it's fun to wish for a crazy win for Victoria, just to show the bros a thing or two. But at least Caleb was playing the game. Of course, he did have to learn the game first, since he had no idea how BB works. Victoria seemed completely oblivious to the game for most of the season. Victoria in the final three would be a hoot for sure. It might just happen.
She is convinced she will win the endurance part of the final HOH. No doubt. Guaranteed. She told Derrick she is going to crush it. End of story. They talk about the first endurance comp, the first HOH. She tells him that she would have won that comp if it wasn't for her extensions. Turns out the extensions weighed ten pounds after they were sprayed with all that goop. And every time the log turned her upside down, they would hang down and really hurt her head Her extensions caused her so much pain that she had to drop.
Those extensions have caused her so much trouble and worry. Last night, before she washed her hair up in the HOH shower, she told Derrick all about her hair. Well, she didn't tell him why her hair fell out, that part is still a mystery. But she did explain how traumatized she was when it happened. She is still so ashamed and mortified that I can't even make fun of her.That's kind of how it's been all season. She is so odd, so ditzy, so bad at this game, and yet I kind of like her for making it this far in spite of herself.
9/17 2:45 a.m. cam 1
Here she is in the final four, and she is still so worried that the hgs know she wears extensions, that they might see her without them. After her shower she shows Derrick her real hair. She lets him touch it. Brave little princess. Maybe she needs to go to the jury house now, so she can have some privacy to get her hair ready for the finale. Run away little princess, run while you can.
9/17 3:19 a.m. cam 1
I can't wait for tonight's show, and then the endurance comp we have all been waiting for. I hope and pray that BB lets us see the rest of the comp on the feeds. It better be the endurance comp to beat all endurance comps. We deserve it. We made it to the final four! We survived!!! Live feeders FTW!
Have a Dorky Day!
Monday, September 15, 2014
It's Craft Activity Day at BB16 Summer Camp!
Big Brother gave the hgs alcohol last night, and Victoria drank almost a whole bottle of wine. She was a bit tipsy to say the least. Derrick kept telling her to stop, but she kept right on drinking. She got all flirty, and giggly, and seriously annoying. She kept smiling at Derrick. She followed him around just like the old days. She obviously forgot every last bit of her secret agent training. At one point she could barely keep her eyes open, but she would not go to sleep until the guys went to sleep.
After she spent almost an hour telling Caleb how wonderful he is, Caleb returned the favor in that special BeastMode way he has:
Victoria: Love you Caleb
Caleb: Love you too.
(insert extremely long awkward hug here)
Caleb: You done good. Not gonna say you are the best competitor.....
Victoria: Well, I have done good socially. I never stirred up anything, I stayed loyal
Caleb: Yep! You have done exactly all you needed to do. (which is his way of saying she has done absolutely nothing)
Victoria: Aww, thanks Caleb
While this was going on upstairs, Cody and Derrick were having their own very strange convo downstairs. First they swore to never, ever, nominate each other when they get to final four. They repeat this promise to each other several times. And then they decide that it might just be better to nominate each other after all!
This will make Caleb feel all comfy cozy with them, just in case he wins the veto. Maybe they are the ones who drank all the wine last night, because nowhere in this convo do they seem to remember that Caleb would be the only one voting in this scenario. Another no fail plan by the rag tag remnants of the Best-Worst-Alliance-Ever!
They all finally go to bed, but Derrick, Frankie, and Victoria are all up about an hour later because they can't sleep. It's cereal time! What would BB be without cereal, chips, chomping mouths , and smacking lips? Frankie takes his cereal outside and chomp-smacks away as he performs for the live feeders.
Then he tells us what he will do after BB. The life of a social media mogul-o-maniac superstar of Big Brother is rough on the body. Turns out he has a long list of doctors he plans to see ASAP. He tells his mom to start making appointments, STAT!!
A little later Derrick is trying to talk some game sense into a still tipsy Victoria. He gets so frustrated that he almost slips and tells her he's a cop! Left alone after the convo, he tells us that was a very close call. He almost blew his entire game! He seems pretty shook up.
Well, they are all gonna be shook up today! The Fabulous Frankie Eviction should take place this afternoon!!! The hgs have been promised an activity day. This means BB will tape them doing something crafty while they pretend it's night time, to fool the BBAD viewers. BB is tricky that way!
As I write this, the hgs have awakened to discover tie dye kits in the storage room. They are mostly underwhelmed. Caleb is still listening for the doorbell, hoping for a celebrity with a diesel truck full of cash to walk in the door. They still have no idea about today's eviction as the feeds go down and we get those stupid Jeff videos.
Most likely the feeds will be down until after Tuesday's, or maybe even Wednesday's show. Typically, this is your chance to get some housework done, visit with friends you haven't seen all season, and stock up on snacks for this weeks episodes. But you are all busy watching Utopia live feeds, so I fear there is no hope for you getting anything done before the eviction show.
Well, I for one have resisted all urges to sign up for my Utopia passport, free or paid. I just don't trust Fox with my personal info. I am Fox-phobic. And I can't get any of the other free Utopia feeds sites to work. So I guess it's up to me. There will be no dorky blog tomorrow. I'll be too busy slipping flat snack foods under your doors so you don't starve to death under Hex's new Anarchy regime!
Have a Dorky Day!
After she spent almost an hour telling Caleb how wonderful he is, Caleb returned the favor in that special BeastMode way he has:
Victoria: Love you Caleb
Caleb: Love you too.
(insert extremely long awkward hug here)
Caleb: You done good. Not gonna say you are the best competitor.....
Victoria: Well, I have done good socially. I never stirred up anything, I stayed loyal
Caleb: Yep! You have done exactly all you needed to do. (which is his way of saying she has done absolutely nothing)
Victoria: Aww, thanks Caleb
While this was going on upstairs, Cody and Derrick were having their own very strange convo downstairs. First they swore to never, ever, nominate each other when they get to final four. They repeat this promise to each other several times. And then they decide that it might just be better to nominate each other after all!
This will make Caleb feel all comfy cozy with them, just in case he wins the veto. Maybe they are the ones who drank all the wine last night, because nowhere in this convo do they seem to remember that Caleb would be the only one voting in this scenario. Another no fail plan by the rag tag remnants of the Best-Worst-Alliance-Ever!
They all finally go to bed, but Derrick, Frankie, and Victoria are all up about an hour later because they can't sleep. It's cereal time! What would BB be without cereal, chips, chomping mouths , and smacking lips? Frankie takes his cereal outside and chomp-smacks away as he performs for the live feeders.
Then he tells us what he will do after BB. The life of a social media mogul-o-maniac superstar of Big Brother is rough on the body. Turns out he has a long list of doctors he plans to see ASAP. He tells his mom to start making appointments, STAT!!
- Dermatologist is his first stop.
- Podiatrist, for his left ankle and foot, which he says he injured in a comp
- Dentist, as he rolls his tongue around inside his mouth
- Orthopedic surgeon, for his back. His eyes go a little dreamy as he imagines the dire diagnosis
- Complete blood work-up, to check his mercury levels from all the tuna he's been eating. His eyes are still a little dreamy, because blood work might reveal he has all kinds of parasites and poisons from the horrid conditions under which he has been forced to live for three months
- General Doctor, to catch anything the specialists might have missed
- Ear, Nose, & Throat Doctor, because, OMG, because of everything.
- And he needs to get his whole body waxed!!!
A little later Derrick is trying to talk some game sense into a still tipsy Victoria. He gets so frustrated that he almost slips and tells her he's a cop! Left alone after the convo, he tells us that was a very close call. He almost blew his entire game! He seems pretty shook up.
Well, they are all gonna be shook up today! The Fabulous Frankie Eviction should take place this afternoon!!! The hgs have been promised an activity day. This means BB will tape them doing something crafty while they pretend it's night time, to fool the BBAD viewers. BB is tricky that way!
As I write this, the hgs have awakened to discover tie dye kits in the storage room. They are mostly underwhelmed. Caleb is still listening for the doorbell, hoping for a celebrity with a diesel truck full of cash to walk in the door. They still have no idea about today's eviction as the feeds go down and we get those stupid Jeff videos.
Most likely the feeds will be down until after Tuesday's, or maybe even Wednesday's show. Typically, this is your chance to get some housework done, visit with friends you haven't seen all season, and stock up on snacks for this weeks episodes. But you are all busy watching Utopia live feeds, so I fear there is no hope for you getting anything done before the eviction show.
Well, I for one have resisted all urges to sign up for my Utopia passport, free or paid. I just don't trust Fox with my personal info. I am Fox-phobic. And I can't get any of the other free Utopia feeds sites to work. So I guess it's up to me. There will be no dorky blog tomorrow. I'll be too busy slipping flat snack foods under your doors so you don't starve to death under Hex's new Anarchy regime!
Have a Dorky Day!
Sunday, September 14, 2014
Victoria's Extensions For The Win!!!
Yesterday I tuned into the feeds now and then. Mostly boring. The hgs are about to crack from that strange mix of pressure and boredom we see around this time every season. The end is so close, yet so far away. They have been locked up so long together they can't stand it one more second. They want so badly to stay in the game and win, but if they don't get out of that house right now, they might just go completely crazy. I kept checking in, hoping for the crazy.
Frankie plopped himself down in that stupid bird nest bed and tried his usual tricks on Caleb. He pats the bed and tells Caleb to come on over here, sit here next to me, come on, right here. Like he's talking to a dog. But this dog (Caleb) has learned some new tricks.
Caleb eventually does sit down on the bed, but he positions himself far away from Frankie. He rarely makes eye contact. He squashes every whiny, wheedling thing that Frankie comes up with to save his sorry butt. Frankie is doing all the same things that have worked on Caleb for this whole game, but they aren't working now. Frankie seems a bit lost here. He's saying all the right things, why isn't Caleb groveling at his feet? Frankie keeps trying to get close enough for a cuddle, but it's just not happening.
He finally pulls the charity card. He says that he is playing an honorable game because he would never want to win dirty money for his charity. Since Caleb has already argued that Frankie has all the jury votes because of that charity, Frankie's charity card is totally wasted on Caleb. Frankie also pulls the world card. The world will hate Caleb if he betrays Frankie. Caleb's world is filled with recording contracts, acting jobs, red carpets and limousines, so Frankie's world card is just litter at Caleb's superstar feet.
9/14 1:54 a.m. cam 3-4
Frankie leaves the HOH with absolutely no reassurances of safety from Caleb. His magic glitter wand isn't working anymore! Where are his magical powers??? Frankie has no choice now but to call forth the dark twitter magic of Ariana's fans, to ensure that he wins Americas favorite Player.
In other news, Victoria is seriously considering going rogue! She complains to Derrick about everything she has to put up with in this house! She is fed up! She is the last girl standing, she has no one to talk to, she hates Cody with every fiber of her being, it's not fair! She wants to cause some drama! Victoria is ready to rumble!
She tells Derrick that she wants to have a one-on-one with Caleb. She wants to tell Caleb about her hair. This will make Caleb want to take her to the final two. She will tell him the true story of what happened to make her hair fall out, and then they will have a bond. And when he knows about her hair, he will know how badly she needs the money.
She says all this with that gleam in her eye, her secret agent-special-mission-gleam. Her hair story will be her biggest game move ever!!! Derrick has to work hard to nip this silly plan in the bud. He tells her all the reasons why a sob story this late in the game would backfire, and probably send her packing. She backs down a bit, but you can tell she is still seriously considering this move. She is gonna go rogue, I just know it!
9/14 1:24 a.m. cam 1
Will Ariana's fans win the twitter war and crown Frankie J. Grande as America's Most Hated Favorite Player? And what is the true story of Victoria's hair? How can it save her game? Will she show Caleb her bloody scalp? Will Caleb be wearing her extensions at the veto ceremony today? They would look mighty fine with those damn bunny slippers.
Have a Dorky Day!
Frankie plopped himself down in that stupid bird nest bed and tried his usual tricks on Caleb. He pats the bed and tells Caleb to come on over here, sit here next to me, come on, right here. Like he's talking to a dog. But this dog (Caleb) has learned some new tricks.
Caleb eventually does sit down on the bed, but he positions himself far away from Frankie. He rarely makes eye contact. He squashes every whiny, wheedling thing that Frankie comes up with to save his sorry butt. Frankie is doing all the same things that have worked on Caleb for this whole game, but they aren't working now. Frankie seems a bit lost here. He's saying all the right things, why isn't Caleb groveling at his feet? Frankie keeps trying to get close enough for a cuddle, but it's just not happening.
He finally pulls the charity card. He says that he is playing an honorable game because he would never want to win dirty money for his charity. Since Caleb has already argued that Frankie has all the jury votes because of that charity, Frankie's charity card is totally wasted on Caleb. Frankie also pulls the world card. The world will hate Caleb if he betrays Frankie. Caleb's world is filled with recording contracts, acting jobs, red carpets and limousines, so Frankie's world card is just litter at Caleb's superstar feet.
9/14 1:54 a.m. cam 3-4
Frankie leaves the HOH with absolutely no reassurances of safety from Caleb. His magic glitter wand isn't working anymore! Where are his magical powers??? Frankie has no choice now but to call forth the dark twitter magic of Ariana's fans, to ensure that he wins Americas favorite Player.
In other news, Victoria is seriously considering going rogue! She complains to Derrick about everything she has to put up with in this house! She is fed up! She is the last girl standing, she has no one to talk to, she hates Cody with every fiber of her being, it's not fair! She wants to cause some drama! Victoria is ready to rumble!
She tells Derrick that she wants to have a one-on-one with Caleb. She wants to tell Caleb about her hair. This will make Caleb want to take her to the final two. She will tell him the true story of what happened to make her hair fall out, and then they will have a bond. And when he knows about her hair, he will know how badly she needs the money.
She says all this with that gleam in her eye, her secret agent-special-mission-gleam. Her hair story will be her biggest game move ever!!! Derrick has to work hard to nip this silly plan in the bud. He tells her all the reasons why a sob story this late in the game would backfire, and probably send her packing. She backs down a bit, but you can tell she is still seriously considering this move. She is gonna go rogue, I just know it!
9/14 1:24 a.m. cam 1
Will Ariana's fans win the twitter war and crown Frankie J. Grande as America's Most Hated Favorite Player? And what is the true story of Victoria's hair? How can it save her game? Will she show Caleb her bloody scalp? Will Caleb be wearing her extensions at the veto ceremony today? They would look mighty fine with those damn bunny slippers.
Have a Dorky Day!
Thursday, September 11, 2014
Production Has Left The Building!
What can I say? I have no words. Well, I have words, but they are not suitable for print. Suffice it to say I am quite cranky this morning. Cranky to the max. But that's old news. That's just a replay of how I felt last week. I'm on a cranky rewind.
Caleb won the HOH comp. The rewind HOH comp. The comp they have already played once. That we've already seen before. The comp that they didn't let us see the winner of on the show, again. The comp that maybe Frankie threw this time.
I can't decide on that one. Did he throw it to make sure he would be able to play in the next HOH? I sure won't suggest this to Caleb, because he get's all crazy eyed about it. He crushed that comp! He is so great, and awesome, and crushing! No way Frankie threw that comp! Caleb crushed him! Lot's of crushing talk last night.
Derrick is now working double, triple, undercover overtime to keep his butt off the block. Victoria is working undercover too! Derrick has convinced her that she might be safe from leaving this week if they keep up the act.
Victoria is positively beaming when they talk about their secret mission. I love seeing her so happy to be finally playing the game. But I get all worried whenever they talk now. What if someone watching the HOH spy screen sees her smiling and talking with Derrick? What if her cover is blown?
Meanwhile, they take a break from worrying about noms to study for the veto comp. The comp they already played once! Aaaarghhh! This rewind twist is so infuriating! Why did they do this stupid rewind? Why, why, why??? Has production left the building? Or maybe production has been taken hostage, leaving the interns to run the show? Did Allison Grodner just forget we already did this, or is she truly evil?
Let's just get this week over with! But first, Julie wants us to vote on tarantulas? For another show? WTF?? I vote for lots and lots of hairy tarantulas.
But why should Julie have all the fun? I think all of production should join her. Let's punish them for dreaming up this ridiculous week of rewinds. I say we throw them all in a giant box, with tarantulas and all sorts of nasty creepy crawlies, while wearing shock unitards, in between chum baths, after we shave their heads! I could rewind that all the day long!
Have a Dorky Day!
Caleb won the HOH comp. The rewind HOH comp. The comp they have already played once. That we've already seen before. The comp that they didn't let us see the winner of on the show, again. The comp that maybe Frankie threw this time.
I can't decide on that one. Did he throw it to make sure he would be able to play in the next HOH? I sure won't suggest this to Caleb, because he get's all crazy eyed about it. He crushed that comp! He is so great, and awesome, and crushing! No way Frankie threw that comp! Caleb crushed him! Lot's of crushing talk last night.
Derrick is now working double, triple, undercover overtime to keep his butt off the block. Victoria is working undercover too! Derrick has convinced her that she might be safe from leaving this week if they keep up the act.
Victoria is positively beaming when they talk about their secret mission. I love seeing her so happy to be finally playing the game. But I get all worried whenever they talk now. What if someone watching the HOH spy screen sees her smiling and talking with Derrick? What if her cover is blown?
Meanwhile, they take a break from worrying about noms to study for the veto comp. The comp they already played once! Aaaarghhh! This rewind twist is so infuriating! Why did they do this stupid rewind? Why, why, why??? Has production left the building? Or maybe production has been taken hostage, leaving the interns to run the show? Did Allison Grodner just forget we already did this, or is she truly evil?
Let's just get this week over with! But first, Julie wants us to vote on tarantulas? For another show? WTF?? I vote for lots and lots of hairy tarantulas.
But why should Julie have all the fun? I think all of production should join her. Let's punish them for dreaming up this ridiculous week of rewinds. I say we throw them all in a giant box, with tarantulas and all sorts of nasty creepy crawlies, while wearing shock unitards, in between chum baths, after we shave their heads! I could rewind that all the day long!
Have a Dorky Day!
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
CBS Stops BB16 Dead In It's Tracks!
Victoria was full of surprises yesterday. First we discover that Victoria is afraid of every animal on the planet except for Izzy the dog. She was lovin' on that dog! Izzy was pretty much irresistible. The guys all fell in love with that dog right away. So did the live feeders. For a few hours, the Zach birthday tweets tapered off, and the Izzy pics were trending in our own little BB corner of the world.
Then Izzy left, and we got back to this sad business of boring feeds. Victoria spiced it up for us when she finally talked to Frankie up in the HOH. Derrick had already set things up with the guys by telling them that Victoria was not speaking to him. Victoria didn't even ask Derrick if she could do his laundry! All the guys noticed this. Things must be serious if she ain't doing his laundry!!!
Victoria did a great job with the Frankie talk. She didn't go overboard or get all dramatic. She cried just enough, at the right times, to convince him she was telling the truth. Frankie seemed to be taking care not to throw Derrick under the bus as he tried to comfort her. And Victoria's presentation was consistent with how she has been acting the whole game. I think her mission was a success!
Later on Frankie told Derrick almost everything Victoria said. The guys now believe that Derrick has no chance of getting Victoria's vote if he makes it to final two. I think she deserves $5,000 for a successful task, don't you?
BB gave them a few beers and a teeny, tiny, bottle of wine. Victoria plans to act a little tipsy when she drinks that wine. She will then implement part two of her plan. I'm calling it her plan now, because she is definitely using her own strategy here. She'll talk more about how the jury hates Derrick. Then she'll begin to hint that she thinks Caleb is playing a good, clean, honest, trustworthy game. He deserves to win! He is so loyal! He is BeastMode!
This is all designed to convince Frankie and Cody that they shouldn't be taking Caleb anywhere near the final two. But they all go to bed early, so she doesn't get much done in this department. She and Derrick sneak in a few secret talks before going to sleep. She smiles her happy princess smile as she fills him in on what she has been up to. Victoria is really loving this whole Save Derrick plan.
Meanwhile, I am kind of cranky as I get myself ready for bed. All this Gold Button Rewind business has made for boring feeds and boring episodes. As far as this week goes, Victoria might be doing the only thing that really matters. And tonight we don't even get an eviction!. At least not as far as I can figure things out.
All week long I have been fantasizing about the possibility of Frankie being evicted tonight! This is what has kept me going! It gave me hope! A reason to live!
But, once again, Julie smashes my dreams to smithereens! She told us right after Christine's eviction that if that damn gold button was pushed there would be no eviction tonight. She said the game will stop dead in it's tracks. WTF? No eviction? Can this be true?
I missed it. No matter how hard I try to listen to Julie, I always miss the most important thing she is saying. So I missed it when Julie told us that CBS is doing it's twisted best to ruin the last few weeks of this season even more with this stupid gold button rewind.
Oh well, If BB wants to stop this game dead in it's tracks, who am I to argue? I'll just mosey on over to Utopia and see what kind of trouble Bella is causing already this morning. Then I'll watch me some CBBUK, and BBAU, and try to think some happy thoughts.
But I will still be cranky, no matter how much fun I might be having in other reality lands. I love BBUS. I stick it out every season. I'm still there when live feeders and bloggers don't even bother to check in on the live feeds, when they even stop watching the shows. One of my fave bloggers is so over this season he is boycotting the shows. He is writing brilliant recaps of the shows he won't be watching, before they air, and he nails it every time!
But I hang on to the very end. You'll find me tied to the twisted tracks of this most useless final five week ever. I am a BBUS die hard. And this season I am dying hard for sure.
Have a Dorky Day!
Then Izzy left, and we got back to this sad business of boring feeds. Victoria spiced it up for us when she finally talked to Frankie up in the HOH. Derrick had already set things up with the guys by telling them that Victoria was not speaking to him. Victoria didn't even ask Derrick if she could do his laundry! All the guys noticed this. Things must be serious if she ain't doing his laundry!!!
Victoria did a great job with the Frankie talk. She didn't go overboard or get all dramatic. She cried just enough, at the right times, to convince him she was telling the truth. Frankie seemed to be taking care not to throw Derrick under the bus as he tried to comfort her. And Victoria's presentation was consistent with how she has been acting the whole game. I think her mission was a success!
Later on Frankie told Derrick almost everything Victoria said. The guys now believe that Derrick has no chance of getting Victoria's vote if he makes it to final two. I think she deserves $5,000 for a successful task, don't you?
BB gave them a few beers and a teeny, tiny, bottle of wine. Victoria plans to act a little tipsy when she drinks that wine. She will then implement part two of her plan. I'm calling it her plan now, because she is definitely using her own strategy here. She'll talk more about how the jury hates Derrick. Then she'll begin to hint that she thinks Caleb is playing a good, clean, honest, trustworthy game. He deserves to win! He is so loyal! He is BeastMode!
This is all designed to convince Frankie and Cody that they shouldn't be taking Caleb anywhere near the final two. But they all go to bed early, so she doesn't get much done in this department. She and Derrick sneak in a few secret talks before going to sleep. She smiles her happy princess smile as she fills him in on what she has been up to. Victoria is really loving this whole Save Derrick plan.
Meanwhile, I am kind of cranky as I get myself ready for bed. All this Gold Button Rewind business has made for boring feeds and boring episodes. As far as this week goes, Victoria might be doing the only thing that really matters. And tonight we don't even get an eviction!. At least not as far as I can figure things out.
All week long I have been fantasizing about the possibility of Frankie being evicted tonight! This is what has kept me going! It gave me hope! A reason to live!
But, once again, Julie smashes my dreams to smithereens! She told us right after Christine's eviction that if that damn gold button was pushed there would be no eviction tonight. She said the game will stop dead in it's tracks. WTF? No eviction? Can this be true?
I missed it. No matter how hard I try to listen to Julie, I always miss the most important thing she is saying. So I missed it when Julie told us that CBS is doing it's twisted best to ruin the last few weeks of this season even more with this stupid gold button rewind.
Oh well, If BB wants to stop this game dead in it's tracks, who am I to argue? I'll just mosey on over to Utopia and see what kind of trouble Bella is causing already this morning. Then I'll watch me some CBBUK, and BBAU, and try to think some happy thoughts.
But I will still be cranky, no matter how much fun I might be having in other reality lands. I love BBUS. I stick it out every season. I'm still there when live feeders and bloggers don't even bother to check in on the live feeds, when they even stop watching the shows. One of my fave bloggers is so over this season he is boycotting the shows. He is writing brilliant recaps of the shows he won't be watching, before they air, and he nails it every time!
But I hang on to the very end. You'll find me tied to the twisted tracks of this most useless final five week ever. I am a BBUS die hard. And this season I am dying hard for sure.
Have a Dorky Day!
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
Fake Fight! Fake Fight!
Today BB will surprise the house guests with a dog. A dog for a day. America had the choice to vote in a bunny or a dog. Seriously. A dog for a day! I'm sure this will make for positively riveting live feeds. It has nothing to do with the game, but who cares about game anymore? Look at the cute doggie!
Maybe it's a therapy dog, and Victoria will learn to love animals. She is gonna freak the fook out when they find that dog in the house. She's deathly afraid of dogs, and cats, and squirrels, and crows. Especially crows.
Plus, Victoria has other things on her mind today. Very important things. Last night she and Derrick came up with a plan to help Derrick stay in the game after Victoria leaves. Well, it's really Derrick's plan. He got a little worried earlier, when Caleb told him that Frankie said Derrick will have lots of jury votes because he is a family man. That's when Derrick started working on a plan. Then he worked his magic on Victoria, and she thinks they came up with it together. Derrick is tricky that way.
Victoria will act like she is mad at Derrick because he told her he wouldn't be voting to keep her. She'll tell Frankie that she is so mad at Derrick for working with the guys that she will not vote for him if he is in the final two. She will fake cry, and tell Frankie that Nicole told her that the jury hates Derrick. All of this is to convince Frankie that Derrick is not a threat, that he has no jury votes. She will lie, and cry, and Frankie will believe her.
Fake fight!! Fake Fight!! Derrick tells her to go for it. He tells her that she can can be as nasty as she likes. He tells her how impressed he is that she can fake cry. The more they talk about this plan, the happier Victoria is. She is loving this!
The best part is that when she votes for Derrick to win, she will get to tell Frankie that this was all a lie! She will smash his dreams on national television! And Derrick will win! And it will be because of Victoria! She is so excited that she wants to start right now!!!
Derrick thinks maybe they should do it later. They decide to start either this morning, or around 5:00 pm. And then, on Wednesday, if the gold button changes things, and Victoria stays, they will pretend to make up. He coaches her on what to say. She can say all kinds of bad things about him, that's cool. She says she knows exactly how to do this. She is sure that she can pull this off. She is so happy about this plan that she completely forgets that she will soon be voted out.
Fake fights in Big Brother rarely work. They usually involve a fake confrontation. And the fake fight always looks pretty much like a fake fight. It's all up to Victoria now. I hope she can do it. I don't really think that Derrick needs her help to stay. I just want to see Victoria trick Frankie with her fake fighting skills. You go girl!
Derrick takes a moment to tell the live feeders that he is taking a page out of Dan's play book, comparing this fake fight to Dan's funeral. Derrick, you are nothing like Dan. Dan worked his magic with three or four key words and a lot of listening. You need a thousand words, repeated over and over, to get things done. Dan sprayed a mind control mist, you wield a brain washing fire hose.
So, that's the plan. Fake fight and dog-for-a-day. Will Victoria be so freaked out about the dog that she forgets her lines? Or will she use her fear of all living creatures to give us the best fake fight we've ever seen? Fake Fight FTW!!!
Have a Dorky Day!
Maybe it's a therapy dog, and Victoria will learn to love animals. She is gonna freak the fook out when they find that dog in the house. She's deathly afraid of dogs, and cats, and squirrels, and crows. Especially crows.
Plus, Victoria has other things on her mind today. Very important things. Last night she and Derrick came up with a plan to help Derrick stay in the game after Victoria leaves. Well, it's really Derrick's plan. He got a little worried earlier, when Caleb told him that Frankie said Derrick will have lots of jury votes because he is a family man. That's when Derrick started working on a plan. Then he worked his magic on Victoria, and she thinks they came up with it together. Derrick is tricky that way.
Victoria will act like she is mad at Derrick because he told her he wouldn't be voting to keep her. She'll tell Frankie that she is so mad at Derrick for working with the guys that she will not vote for him if he is in the final two. She will fake cry, and tell Frankie that Nicole told her that the jury hates Derrick. All of this is to convince Frankie that Derrick is not a threat, that he has no jury votes. She will lie, and cry, and Frankie will believe her.
Fake fight!! Fake Fight!! Derrick tells her to go for it. He tells her that she can can be as nasty as she likes. He tells her how impressed he is that she can fake cry. The more they talk about this plan, the happier Victoria is. She is loving this!
The best part is that when she votes for Derrick to win, she will get to tell Frankie that this was all a lie! She will smash his dreams on national television! And Derrick will win! And it will be because of Victoria! She is so excited that she wants to start right now!!!
Derrick thinks maybe they should do it later. They decide to start either this morning, or around 5:00 pm. And then, on Wednesday, if the gold button changes things, and Victoria stays, they will pretend to make up. He coaches her on what to say. She can say all kinds of bad things about him, that's cool. She says she knows exactly how to do this. She is sure that she can pull this off. She is so happy about this plan that she completely forgets that she will soon be voted out.
Fake fights in Big Brother rarely work. They usually involve a fake confrontation. And the fake fight always looks pretty much like a fake fight. It's all up to Victoria now. I hope she can do it. I don't really think that Derrick needs her help to stay. I just want to see Victoria trick Frankie with her fake fighting skills. You go girl!
Derrick takes a moment to tell the live feeders that he is taking a page out of Dan's play book, comparing this fake fight to Dan's funeral. Derrick, you are nothing like Dan. Dan worked his magic with three or four key words and a lot of listening. You need a thousand words, repeated over and over, to get things done. Dan sprayed a mind control mist, you wield a brain washing fire hose.
So, that's the plan. Fake fight and dog-for-a-day. Will Victoria be so freaked out about the dog that she forgets her lines? Or will she use her fear of all living creatures to give us the best fake fight we've ever seen? Fake Fight FTW!!!
Have a Dorky Day!
Saturday, September 6, 2014
OK! Let's Play Big Brother! Who Want's To Be The Britney?
Well, another day of boring feeds. I never learn. I figure it's nomination day and maybe we'll have a surprise. Maybe Frankie's noms will bring us a little excitement! Maybe I'm a fool! Ya think?
The feeds go down for hours, and when they come back, still no noms. Turns out that Jeff & Jordan were in the back yard getting engaged! Imagine that! And there was a party! With cake, and champagne, and music! Who cares?
I love Jordan, she's a hoot! And Jeff is okay, I guess. But I don't care if they get married. If you love them, if you care about this engagement, good for you. I'm fine with that. I'm not bashing Jeff & Jordan. I just want the nom ceremony to be over, so that I can start complaining about it!
I love Jordan, she's a hoot! And Jeff is okay, I guess. But I don't care if they get married. If you love them, if you care about this engagement, good for you. I'm fine with that. I'm not bashing Jeff & Jordan. I just want the nom ceremony to be over, so that I can start complaining about it!
By the time the noms come I have already given up. I don't even care anymore. Frankie noms Cody and Victoria, as promised. By now I have turned off the feeds. I'm just checking in with twitter for nom updates, and to see if Julie Chen has finally decided what the Gold Button Rewind rules really are. The last report said that Derrick would not be eligible to play in the Rewind HOH competition. Are you sure Julie? Can we finally quote you on that???
I check back with the feeds later in the evening, and it's Victoria that brings me a little joy. She is up in the HOH with Frankie. It's a meandering convo that ends up with both of them chomping on chips, but it was worth watching. Frankie pretends that he was completely oblivious to how evil Christine was, and Victoria pretends to believe him.
And just when I'm thinking that maybe Victoria is finally understanding this game of Big Brother, she proves me wrong. She tells Frankie that she is so proud to be the last woman standing! She is so happy that she lasted longer than Christine. And then she says "I'm so glad I crushed her dreams of being Britney in The Brigade!"
9/6 1:50 a.m. cam 1
Oh my goodness Victoria! You don't want to be Britney in The Brigade. You hope and pray you will never be the Britney, because the Britney gets voted out!!! Will she ever understand this game? I don't think so. Even if she makes it to the final two, even if she wins, I don't think she will ever really get it. And if she makes it that far, I guess it didn't really matter anyway.
Later on, when it's finally bedtime in the BB house, Victoria decides to ask some serious questions about sex. They are all in the fire room with the lights out. She addresses her questions to Cody, but all the guys join in and offer up their words of wisdom.
Victoria, honey, sweetie, do you really want to learn about sex from these nasty boys? Caleb is a BeastMode Stalker! Frankie is Vulgar-To-the Max! Cody would flirt with your sister, mother, and grandmother all at the same time! They are the reason someone will make a Bow-Job montage about you on YouTube!!! And you want them to answer your sex questions?
9/6 3:08 a.m. cam 2
Two months ago this girl would not sleep in the same room with a man. Last night she was getting ready to sleep in a bedroom with four guys, and decided to ask them all about sex. She may have come a long way since walking into the BB house, but I'm a little worried about where she might end up. I'm gonna throw some birdseed over the BB wall. Only the crows can save her now.
Have a Dorky Day!
Have a Dorky Day!
Friday, September 5, 2014
Boo! Hiss! Hooray!!!
Christine walked out of the BB house and the audience booed her loud and clear! It was awesome! I loved it! I've never heard a BB audience boo like that. I have wanted them to boo plenty of times, but BB runs that audience with an iron fist. The live audience response is as scripted as most of the drs we've been seeing lately. Last night the boos for Christine were music to my ears.
Christine was just so mean! She griped about everything, all the time. She hated everyone! She loved to talk about how much she hated people. She would sit there on the bed, holding a Bible in her lap, and just randomly announce that she hated someone.
Last night I didn't even feel the least bit guilty that those boos made me so happy. And I didn't feel bad for her at all. Christine seems like the kind of person that would have jumped at the chance to be in that audience, booing her most hated house guest. And she would have sneaked in a few hisses, just because!
Those boos really had the other hgs freaked the fook out! They seemed totally confused, and upset, to hear the audience respond so negatively. They were ready to hide underneath the beds and never, ever, leave the Big Brother house.
But Frankie took control, and shared his theory about those boos. He is certain that she talked trash about his sister in the diary room! And his fans didn't like that one bit. There is absolutely no other explanation. She trashed his family and the fans have spoken.
He said this over and over again throughout the night. He insists that she hated the fact that he is a Grande, that his sister is a superstar Grande, and that his last name is Grande. And it's obvious to him that she trashed the Grande name in the diary room. He plans to say his last name a hundred times in his goodbye message to her. Grande, Grande, Grande! Frankie is suffering from a Grande delusion about those boos, and there is no telling him otherwise.
Ok, moving right along, we then have some minor freaking out about the gold button. Derrick seems the most upset by its presence. He is still in shock from having won the shortest HOH comp in the history of Big Brother. That gold button is pushing his panic buttons.
Caleb knows all about the gold button. He describes, in detail, how the button will bring him a recording contract, a trip to Hawaii, and large cash prizes. Frankie takes control again, and gives a little speech about gold buttons, and how they work in Big Brother. Then he brags some more about how fabulous he is for winning that veto! Did you see him win? Did you see how he won? Did you know he won? Did you know he is fabulous, and that he won the veto? He is just so damn fabulous!
Some time passes, the feeds go down, and when they return, Voila! Frankie has won the second HOH comp. The gold button has a sign that says it's their choice, all it takes is one push. Frankie wants to push it! Please, please, please, let's push it! And moments later, they do it! A countdown clock shows us that the zero hour is Wednesday night.
We know that the gold button pushing resulted in a rewind. At the zero hour, live voting will stop and the game will rewind, dethroning Frankie and pulling his noms off the block. Then the week will be replayed, starting with a new HOH comp. The only mystery that remains is whether Derrick will be eligible to play in that comp.
We know all this twisted gold button info, but the hgs still know nothing. Lots of speculation and paranoia about that button. It looks like Victoria and Cody will be the noms. Will this week be a big waste, since everything will be flipped come eviction night? Or will it be great fun to watch Frankie scheme and plan and manipulate all for nothing? Will Frankie's ego take on a life of it's own? Will Caleb, Cody, and Frankie practice a Chippendales review in front of those damn mirrors?
And let's not forget the most important detail of all. Victoria is the last woman standing in BB16! You go girl! Victoria FTW!!!
Have a Dorky Day!
Christine was just so mean! She griped about everything, all the time. She hated everyone! She loved to talk about how much she hated people. She would sit there on the bed, holding a Bible in her lap, and just randomly announce that she hated someone.
Last night I didn't even feel the least bit guilty that those boos made me so happy. And I didn't feel bad for her at all. Christine seems like the kind of person that would have jumped at the chance to be in that audience, booing her most hated house guest. And she would have sneaked in a few hisses, just because!
Those boos really had the other hgs freaked the fook out! They seemed totally confused, and upset, to hear the audience respond so negatively. They were ready to hide underneath the beds and never, ever, leave the Big Brother house.
But Frankie took control, and shared his theory about those boos. He is certain that she talked trash about his sister in the diary room! And his fans didn't like that one bit. There is absolutely no other explanation. She trashed his family and the fans have spoken.
He said this over and over again throughout the night. He insists that she hated the fact that he is a Grande, that his sister is a superstar Grande, and that his last name is Grande. And it's obvious to him that she trashed the Grande name in the diary room. He plans to say his last name a hundred times in his goodbye message to her. Grande, Grande, Grande! Frankie is suffering from a Grande delusion about those boos, and there is no telling him otherwise.
Ok, moving right along, we then have some minor freaking out about the gold button. Derrick seems the most upset by its presence. He is still in shock from having won the shortest HOH comp in the history of Big Brother. That gold button is pushing his panic buttons.
Caleb knows all about the gold button. He describes, in detail, how the button will bring him a recording contract, a trip to Hawaii, and large cash prizes. Frankie takes control again, and gives a little speech about gold buttons, and how they work in Big Brother. Then he brags some more about how fabulous he is for winning that veto! Did you see him win? Did you see how he won? Did you know he won? Did you know he is fabulous, and that he won the veto? He is just so damn fabulous!
Some time passes, the feeds go down, and when they return, Voila! Frankie has won the second HOH comp. The gold button has a sign that says it's their choice, all it takes is one push. Frankie wants to push it! Please, please, please, let's push it! And moments later, they do it! A countdown clock shows us that the zero hour is Wednesday night.
We know that the gold button pushing resulted in a rewind. At the zero hour, live voting will stop and the game will rewind, dethroning Frankie and pulling his noms off the block. Then the week will be replayed, starting with a new HOH comp. The only mystery that remains is whether Derrick will be eligible to play in that comp.
We know all this twisted gold button info, but the hgs still know nothing. Lots of speculation and paranoia about that button. It looks like Victoria and Cody will be the noms. Will this week be a big waste, since everything will be flipped come eviction night? Or will it be great fun to watch Frankie scheme and plan and manipulate all for nothing? Will Frankie's ego take on a life of it's own? Will Caleb, Cody, and Frankie practice a Chippendales review in front of those damn mirrors?
And let's not forget the most important detail of all. Victoria is the last woman standing in BB16! You go girl! Victoria FTW!!!
Have a Dorky Day!
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
I Want A Banner Plane And I Want It Now!!!
The feeds were more of the same yesterday. Mostly boring, with plenty of lying and butt kissing. They are all trying to set themselves up for safety for a double eviction on Thursday night. It's impossible to tell whether they are lying or truthing. And do we really care? Let's just go directly to the double eviction and get this season over with already!!
Caleb isn't kissing much butt. His strategy seems to be "Let me tell you what a BB beast I am and then we'll talk some game." His ego knows no bounds. Yesterday, when he did his HOH blog and tweets, BB gave him a few fan questions to answer. One fan asked what kind of girl he likes. Caleb now believes that BB is his personal dating service.
He is convinced that his answer to this question will bring him thousands of "applicants" to fill the position of girlfriend. He imagines they will pay $500 for a chance to date him. He got so excited as he told the guys about this that he had to run to the dr to make sure they were clear on the job description: "Don't love me for my looks, or my truck, just give me $500 and we'll get along real good!"
Victoria has refused to kiss any butt. Derrick tells her to stop spending so much time with Nicole. He explains that Nicole can't do anything for her game. Victoria needs to be talking to Cody and Frankie and Christine! Victoria say NO! She doesn't want to. She won't do it! Not one single butt will be kissed by her princess lips!
This is what you end up with if you carry someone through the game. When it finally comes down to it, Derrick has spent endless hours managing Victoria's moods. It's hard, thankless work. And here they are, on double eviction eve, and she finally says NO! What is a master manipulator to do?
Let's see...hmm..anything else happen lately? Hmmm..Christine told Frankie about coffee enemas and he got a faraway look in his eyes. No..that's not it....hmmm. Oh yeah, I remember now!
A BANNER PLANE FLEW OVER THE HOUSE!!! Yes! Well, allegedly. We had a long indoor lock down and there were many reports of a banner plane flying over the area. "FRANKIE & DERRICK R THE SABOTEURS" was the alleged message. If the hgs saw it they aren't telling. And we sure didn't see it. Dammit!
I love the banner plane. I think it's so wild that a fan would spend that kind of money to fly a message over the house! I thrill at the potential for creating paranoia and panic. A shout over the wall is one thing. Those are free. But a plane costs some dollars, takes some commitment. A banner plane is hard to dismiss as poppycock, the way they've been doing with the shouts. Caleb would take one look at that message and say "I been in the military, and that there banner plane ain't no poppycock!"
I wonder what it's like for people in the neighborhood. If they don't know diddly about BB, what are they thinking when they see that message fly across the sky? Maybe they have a boss named Derrick! Or a boyfriend named Frankie! Maybe they are googling "saboteur" and changing their locks right now! I think about the pilot. Is this a risky business? Will the men in black soon be paying him/her a visit? Will the pilot give up his client when Julie says "I need an answer now!"?
The thought of this alleged banner plane amused and entertained me for hours. I imagined myself chartering a banner plane to fly over the BB house. My message? "FRANKIE IS REALLY 31 YEARS OLD!" It might not change the game, but it would really piss Frankie off! It's a sad day when my imaginary BB life is more fun than my real one.
Have a Dorky Day!
Caleb isn't kissing much butt. His strategy seems to be "Let me tell you what a BB beast I am and then we'll talk some game." His ego knows no bounds. Yesterday, when he did his HOH blog and tweets, BB gave him a few fan questions to answer. One fan asked what kind of girl he likes. Caleb now believes that BB is his personal dating service.
He is convinced that his answer to this question will bring him thousands of "applicants" to fill the position of girlfriend. He imagines they will pay $500 for a chance to date him. He got so excited as he told the guys about this that he had to run to the dr to make sure they were clear on the job description: "Don't love me for my looks, or my truck, just give me $500 and we'll get along real good!"
Victoria has refused to kiss any butt. Derrick tells her to stop spending so much time with Nicole. He explains that Nicole can't do anything for her game. Victoria needs to be talking to Cody and Frankie and Christine! Victoria say NO! She doesn't want to. She won't do it! Not one single butt will be kissed by her princess lips!
This is what you end up with if you carry someone through the game. When it finally comes down to it, Derrick has spent endless hours managing Victoria's moods. It's hard, thankless work. And here they are, on double eviction eve, and she finally says NO! What is a master manipulator to do?
Let's see...hmm..anything else happen lately? Hmmm..Christine told Frankie about coffee enemas and he got a faraway look in his eyes. No..that's not it....hmmm. Oh yeah, I remember now!
A BANNER PLANE FLEW OVER THE HOUSE!!! Yes! Well, allegedly. We had a long indoor lock down and there were many reports of a banner plane flying over the area. "FRANKIE & DERRICK R THE SABOTEURS" was the alleged message. If the hgs saw it they aren't telling. And we sure didn't see it. Dammit!
I love the banner plane. I think it's so wild that a fan would spend that kind of money to fly a message over the house! I thrill at the potential for creating paranoia and panic. A shout over the wall is one thing. Those are free. But a plane costs some dollars, takes some commitment. A banner plane is hard to dismiss as poppycock, the way they've been doing with the shouts. Caleb would take one look at that message and say "I been in the military, and that there banner plane ain't no poppycock!"
I wonder what it's like for people in the neighborhood. If they don't know diddly about BB, what are they thinking when they see that message fly across the sky? Maybe they have a boss named Derrick! Or a boyfriend named Frankie! Maybe they are googling "saboteur" and changing their locks right now! I think about the pilot. Is this a risky business? Will the men in black soon be paying him/her a visit? Will the pilot give up his client when Julie says "I need an answer now!"?
The thought of this alleged banner plane amused and entertained me for hours. I imagined myself chartering a banner plane to fly over the BB house. My message? "FRANKIE IS REALLY 31 YEARS OLD!" It might not change the game, but it would really piss Frankie off! It's a sad day when my imaginary BB life is more fun than my real one.
Have a Dorky Day!
Friday, August 22, 2014
Bye-Bye Zach, Hello Nicole! Frankie...Shut Up!!!
Okay..so...Zach left, Nicole came back, there was no endurance comp, Cody won HOH, and Frankie tried his best to make everything about him. Poop-a-doop!
Zach leaves the house with a sprinkle of Froot Loops and a whole lot of class. This is really hard on Frankie because he loves the guy, but he had to go with what the house wanted. Zach gets to have lots-o-fun in jury house, but Frankie has to live with this really difficult, heartbreaking thing he had to do. It's so hard to be Frankie right now.
Nicole wins her way back into the game, and she tells Frankie his sister was in the audience on double eviction night! It's so great you are back in the house Nicole, but tell me more about my sister! And Nicole saw my sister's billboard! I mean, My Sister! She has a billboard!
The Bomb Squad has an emergency meeting and Derrick commands them all to never speak to Nicole behind closed doors. No one-on-one convos with Nicole allowed. Derrick is positively petrified that Nicole will try to defend herself against all the lies he and the Bomb Squad have told each other about her. After they all agree to this plan, Frankie leaves the room to give Nicole a smoochy hug, and tell her how happy he is that she is back. And now he wants to hear more about his sister's billboard!
And then, Cody wins the HOH. Frankie tells him they make such a great team! Frankie hosting, and Cody winning, that's teamwork! Yay for Frankie! Within minutes of the HOH reveal, Frankie shows up with his bags to move in for the week. Cody says please, please, can I just sleep alone for one night? Is that okay Frankie? Don't be mad, please, please. Ugh! And double ugh!
Nicole does manage to get some alone time with Cody. How did that happen? Where is the Bomb Squad special battalion of the Closed Door Patrol? Slacking already! Her talk with Cody does her no good whatsoever, but at least she tried.
The night devolved into a Donny and Nicole bash-fest. We had a brief intermission when Victoria was whining to Derrick about her Zings. She is worried that people think she is not playing the game. She is playing, playing hard! She cut up Zach's hat didn't she? She doesn't want to disappoint production! Production? WTF??
He seemed really irritated by her whining. He had to talk her down while keeping an eye on all those closed doors. And where is Nicole? She could be unraveling his spool of lies this very minute! Derrick's paranoia is working triple overtime, and Victoria is getting on his last nerve.
It's gonna be a long week for feed watchers. We are hoping for a Pandora's box intervention. Visions of the Diamond Power Of Veto dance in our head. Can Nicole survive the week so that she can win the next HOH comp? Which, by the way, better be endurance, or live feeders everywhere will be turning off the live feeds forever! Will Donny find a Pop-Tarts coup d'etat next time he visits the diary room? I hope so!
But if things keep going the way they are, and it looks like Donny is heading to the jury house, I sure hope he jumps right into the middle of the next Bomb Squad cuddle-fest and asks them all to play with his beard.
As Donny would say: If you can't beat them, do your best to freak them the hell out!
Have a Dorky Day!
Zach leaves the house with a sprinkle of Froot Loops and a whole lot of class. This is really hard on Frankie because he loves the guy, but he had to go with what the house wanted. Zach gets to have lots-o-fun in jury house, but Frankie has to live with this really difficult, heartbreaking thing he had to do. It's so hard to be Frankie right now.
Nicole wins her way back into the game, and she tells Frankie his sister was in the audience on double eviction night! It's so great you are back in the house Nicole, but tell me more about my sister! And Nicole saw my sister's billboard! I mean, My Sister! She has a billboard!
The Bomb Squad has an emergency meeting and Derrick commands them all to never speak to Nicole behind closed doors. No one-on-one convos with Nicole allowed. Derrick is positively petrified that Nicole will try to defend herself against all the lies he and the Bomb Squad have told each other about her. After they all agree to this plan, Frankie leaves the room to give Nicole a smoochy hug, and tell her how happy he is that she is back. And now he wants to hear more about his sister's billboard!
And then, Cody wins the HOH. Frankie tells him they make such a great team! Frankie hosting, and Cody winning, that's teamwork! Yay for Frankie! Within minutes of the HOH reveal, Frankie shows up with his bags to move in for the week. Cody says please, please, can I just sleep alone for one night? Is that okay Frankie? Don't be mad, please, please. Ugh! And double ugh!
Nicole does manage to get some alone time with Cody. How did that happen? Where is the Bomb Squad special battalion of the Closed Door Patrol? Slacking already! Her talk with Cody does her no good whatsoever, but at least she tried.
The night devolved into a Donny and Nicole bash-fest. We had a brief intermission when Victoria was whining to Derrick about her Zings. She is worried that people think she is not playing the game. She is playing, playing hard! She cut up Zach's hat didn't she? She doesn't want to disappoint production! Production? WTF??
He seemed really irritated by her whining. He had to talk her down while keeping an eye on all those closed doors. And where is Nicole? She could be unraveling his spool of lies this very minute! Derrick's paranoia is working triple overtime, and Victoria is getting on his last nerve.
It's gonna be a long week for feed watchers. We are hoping for a Pandora's box intervention. Visions of the Diamond Power Of Veto dance in our head. Can Nicole survive the week so that she can win the next HOH comp? Which, by the way, better be endurance, or live feeders everywhere will be turning off the live feeds forever! Will Donny find a Pop-Tarts coup d'etat next time he visits the diary room? I hope so!
But if things keep going the way they are, and it looks like Donny is heading to the jury house, I sure hope he jumps right into the middle of the next Bomb Squad cuddle-fest and asks them all to play with his beard.
As Donny would say: If you can't beat them, do your best to freak them the hell out!
Have a Dorky Day!
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
#PinkHatProject
Yesterday was another mostly lazy day on the feeds. Derrick was working everyone, in his own lazy way. Hey dude! While we are sitting here just enjoying an easy week, let me plant some seeds in the fertile ground of your bored-to-tears brain. He broke down the big picture for each house guest. He had a slightly different big picture for each of them. Derrick is tricky that way.
Zach was trying his best to see this big picture. He wants to know just how big is this big picture? And where is it hiding? Who is in charge of this big picture? Zach tried to paint his own big picture for them, but nobody showed any interest.
Donny and Zach had a few good convos about working together if Zach comes back in the house after he is evicted. It was kind of exciting to think it could happen, and kind of sad because it probably won't. They both seemed to be speaking the truth to each other.
Frankie and Cody had a convo about being super close, and super tight, and super bff's. And nobody even suspects that they are super-duper working together! Frankie fed Cody some more super lies, and Cody thought they were super delicious. It was a really super convo.
Cody and Christine may have talked game, but I cannot watch them anymore, so if they did I missed it. Caleb, Derrick, and Frankie had a long convo about Cody and Christine being so close even after the Zings they got from Zingbot. Caleb seems very concerned about this. He deems it inappropriate. BeastMode Bunny Slippers, newly released from StalkMance Rehab, is deeply offended by their unseemly behavior.
Victoria and Christine talked about how Donny is an evil, conniving, pervert. They seemed focused on the pervert part. Seriously? They are living in a house with guys who hump each other every five minutes, have running gags about balls and holes, share daily reports on Jack Shack activities, and Donny is the perv?
Victoria spent most of the day obsessing about the symbolism of the shredded pink hat. She hopes that her parents are proud of her for taking a knife to that hat. Her own hat, her own property, which she gave to Zach and then took back. She really wants him to go berzerkers about that hat. Her eyes get all dreamy when she thinks about it.
The Shredding Of The Pink Hat has had a galvanizing effect on live feeders. Up until the shredding, most of us were hoping that the pink hat would meet a fiery death in that comp where the hgs each have to burn one article of clothing. We hated that hat. Zach fidgeted with that hat all the time. That hat was the pink cherry on the cake of his ridiculous daily attire.
But now, fickle feeders that we are, we take the hat shredding and we create our own symbolism. We form our own Pink Hat Alliance and spread the word far and wide. We send pink hat care packages to live feeders on the West Coast, so that they can throw them over the wall of the BB back yard, to show our Zach love!
#PinkHatProject will soon be trending world wide. If even one pink hat sails over that wall to land at Zach's feet, we will have done our part to create a whole new level of paranoia in that BB house! And if Victoria so much as looks at that pink hat sideways, we will implement #OperationBlackCrow, and she will be carried away to a land where no princess has ever gone before!!!
Have a Dorky Day!
Zach was trying his best to see this big picture. He wants to know just how big is this big picture? And where is it hiding? Who is in charge of this big picture? Zach tried to paint his own big picture for them, but nobody showed any interest.
Donny and Zach had a few good convos about working together if Zach comes back in the house after he is evicted. It was kind of exciting to think it could happen, and kind of sad because it probably won't. They both seemed to be speaking the truth to each other.
Frankie and Cody had a convo about being super close, and super tight, and super bff's. And nobody even suspects that they are super-duper working together! Frankie fed Cody some more super lies, and Cody thought they were super delicious. It was a really super convo.
Cody and Christine may have talked game, but I cannot watch them anymore, so if they did I missed it. Caleb, Derrick, and Frankie had a long convo about Cody and Christine being so close even after the Zings they got from Zingbot. Caleb seems very concerned about this. He deems it inappropriate. BeastMode Bunny Slippers, newly released from StalkMance Rehab, is deeply offended by their unseemly behavior.
Victoria and Christine talked about how Donny is an evil, conniving, pervert. They seemed focused on the pervert part. Seriously? They are living in a house with guys who hump each other every five minutes, have running gags about balls and holes, share daily reports on Jack Shack activities, and Donny is the perv?
Victoria spent most of the day obsessing about the symbolism of the shredded pink hat. She hopes that her parents are proud of her for taking a knife to that hat. Her own hat, her own property, which she gave to Zach and then took back. She really wants him to go berzerkers about that hat. Her eyes get all dreamy when she thinks about it.
The Shredding Of The Pink Hat has had a galvanizing effect on live feeders. Up until the shredding, most of us were hoping that the pink hat would meet a fiery death in that comp where the hgs each have to burn one article of clothing. We hated that hat. Zach fidgeted with that hat all the time. That hat was the pink cherry on the cake of his ridiculous daily attire.
But now, fickle feeders that we are, we take the hat shredding and we create our own symbolism. We form our own Pink Hat Alliance and spread the word far and wide. We send pink hat care packages to live feeders on the West Coast, so that they can throw them over the wall of the BB back yard, to show our Zach love!
#PinkHatProject will soon be trending world wide. If even one pink hat sails over that wall to land at Zach's feet, we will have done our part to create a whole new level of paranoia in that BB house! And if Victoria so much as looks at that pink hat sideways, we will implement #OperationBlackCrow, and she will be carried away to a land where no princess has ever gone before!!!
Have a Dorky Day!
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
Hide Your Hats, She Has A Knife!!!
Zach is doomed. It's hopeless. He is up on the block as a replacement nom and he will be going out the door this week. Usually I pray for a good twist, a secret power, or some such nonsense to save a hg in his position. But I fear that nothing can save his silly monkey-butt now.
Some fans yelling their love over the backyard wall cheered him up a bit last night. Caleb and Frankie turned a little pale when they heard what sounded like insults for them, and cheers for Zach. I wish it had been a banner plain that could spell it out for those two. There are few things as glorious as the paranoia a banner plane can cause when it blazes the truth across the BB sky. I miss the banner planes, Amen.
Frankie spent the day making sure that everyone hates Zach. He rehashed all the mean things that Zach has said and done, embellishing to the point of lying. Even though Zach has said some nasty things, I still love him. That's the kicker. I love Zach for his mischief making, his absolute delight in creating chaos. Over time he has redeemed himself, and I have absolved him of all sins. That's what BB is all about. We hate them, we love them, we hate them, we love them. We are a fickle fandom.
Victoria doesn't love him. She spent the last two days working herself into a tizzy about Zach. It's not enough that Zach is going to be evicted. She wants to make him so mad he will do something crazy and get himself removed from the house. In handcuffs. With a police escort.
So, she stole his pink hat. Which is actually her pink hat. She gave it to Zach way back when. She plans to cut it into tiny pieces and give it back to him. She hope this will incite him to riot. He leaves his hat unattended for a few minutes and she grabs it. She screams for Christine to bring her a knife!
And then we have a quick visit to the fish tank. The feeds return and the hat is nowhere to be seen. She smiles an evil smile. She mutters insults in Hebrew. She is a happy little princess for about ten minutes before she starts to worry about what he will do when he finds out his hat is missing. What will he do when he sees that she has slashed that hat to shreds? She imagines him doing all kinds of horrible things to her. She is both afraid, and thrilled, that he might try to hurt her. Every scenario she describes begins with him throwing boiling water on her face, and ends with Zach in handcuffs.
Not too long ago Zach came up with a plan to make Devin so mad he would attack Zach and get himself thrown out of the house. It was the first of Zach's many completely ridiculous Best-Worst-Plans-Ever. That's when I really fell in love with Zach.
I'm not loving Victoria right now, but I kind of like that she actually did something besides cry, and whine, and pluck her facial hair. You go girl! You got game! Way to get a jury vote!
I'm praying that Zach can maintain his cool long enough to ensure that no handcuffs will be involved in his eviction. His game is a mess, he sleeps half the time, he won't change his clothes, and he loves to start trouble. But I love him! I want him to stay. I hope that Thursday's twisted jury twist saves his monkey-butt and sends him right back into the house! Monkey-butt FTW!!!
Have A Dorky Day!
p.s. If you live near the BB house please throw some pink hats over the wall
#PinkHatProject..get tweeting!
Thanks to Kristine B. and DeAnna B.
p.s. If you live near the BB house please throw some pink hats over the wall
#PinkHatProject..get tweeting!
Thanks to Kristine B. and DeAnna B.
Monday, August 18, 2014
Where Is That Damn Rule Book?
What can I say? Team America finally gets a fun task, and they twist it to make Zach the target once again. They must steal a piece of clothing from each hg and form a neighborhood watch to patrol the house for 24 hours. It's great fun to see the hgs go crazy trying to find all the things that Team America has hidden. The patrol uniforms are hilarious. Frankie's patrol songs are annoyingly loud but still kind of fun. Caleb is a little scary though. He is following Victoria around, up close and personal. I keep expecting him to give her a chest bump. BeastMode Bully at your service, ma'am.
Zach is climbing on the furniture wondering who the hell set the monkeys loose. Last thing he knew, the monkeys were safely locked up until he needed them. Now the monkeys have been set free by persons unknown, and he is getting blamed for it. Some serious monkey business is going down!
But it's no fun watching Frankie and Derrick try to ruin Zach's game one more time. They are only too happy to blame Zach for the missing items. Then Frankie begins his own secret mission to convince everyone that Zach has been a saboteur all along. And that he has been making piles of money while trying to sabotage them all! It's the thought of Zach making money from his mischief that really makes everyone mad.
It's all about not getting blood on his hands. Frankie will now be the hero for getting the saboteur out of the game! Frankie even blames Zach for forcing them to use Skittles to choose noms. It's all Zach's fault for not volunteering to go on the block to throw the BOB. Those Skittles are proof positive that Zach is the saboteur!
Out in the back yard, Zach has an attack of monkey fever. He steals the cue ball, and hides it in the bathroom. Zach, you silly monkey butt! You are hopeless! Doomed! You have zillions of fans rooting for you right now! Even Frankie's superstar sister is tweeting mind control messages to Frankie to keep you safe!
Caleb and Cody, on patrol in their Chippendales costumes, find the missing cue ball, and the lynch mob is now victorious. That cue ball has sealed Zach's fate. Then the missing items are discovered. The hgs celebrate for a bit, and then it's back to patrolling the house. Most of the patrolling focuses on Zach. They patrol him up one side and down the other. They patrol him up the wazoo.
Frankie and Caleb take Zach up into the HOH to tell him he will be going on the block. Frankie takes every opportunity to tell Zach that everybody wants him out. He repeats this over and over as he lists all the reasons Zach must go.Frankie very clearly says that he will be putting Zach up as the replacement nom.
This is against the rules. People do it all the time, but it's usually not this obvious.. Does Frankie have a secret plan to get caught breaking this rule? Does he want it to appear that he has no choice but to nom someone else? Someone like Derrick perhaps? Is Frankie that smart? Is it even a possibility that production would enforce this rule? Of course not.
Zach, our little monkey mischief maker, seems to take this news pretty well. He agrees that it's the best move for Frankie to nom him. He encourages him to nom him. Why waste an HOH getting Victoria out of the house? She isn't even playing the game dude, you gotta nominate me!
Meanwhile, Victoria is convinced she is the best BB player in the house, because she said that Zach was a saboteur week two!!! She knew it all along! She has this game all figured out! "OMG you guys, I am smarter than all of you!"
The neighborhood watch soldiers on. The duty roster is posted. For Team America's task to succeed they must have a pair of hgs on watch at all times for 24 hours. This pair cannot be two TA members. And they can't just lay around, they have to actively patrol. Somewhere in the wee hours of the morning, the watch falls apart, and we have a solitary guard just sitting there.
Around this time twitter goes crazy with cries of foul play. Frankie broke the rules by telling Zach he is going up!!! This rule is broken every week, but now people.want production to wake up and dispense punishment! Plus, Team America did not complete it's task, because there were solitary guards who didn't even patrol!!! Where is the rule book? Live feeders everywhere are demanding justice!
People really want Frankie to get a spankie! And they don't want Team America to get any money for this task. I don't either. I say give it to the monkeys, and set them free for good.
Have a Dorky Day!
Sunday, August 10, 2014
Drama For Dummies
Zach wins the veto and now he is safe for the week. Safe equals boring to Zach, so he decides that now is a good time to confess all his sins to Victoria. The only detail of his confession that seems to matter to Victoria is that Derrick was working with some other people besides her.
Then the tears begin. Victoria is always crying to someone about something. And while she is crying she keeps repeating that she doesn't want to start any drama. But people are horrible, she is disgusted, everyone is so mean! She wants to self evict!!! But seriously, she doesn't want to cause any drama.
Last night, the drama she doesn't want to cause is all about Derrick. He betrayed her! It feels like he cheated on her! She doesn't want to be here anymore. She needs to talk to Zach one more time, so that she can be upset all over again. Maybe if she cries to him about her broken heart, she can be sure there won't be any drama! And maybe Derrick will find out how much she wants to avoid drama, and he will come talk to her!
Well, what could be more dramatic than a house meeting? Everyone but Christine and Donny gather in the HOH room to confront Zach about a little lie he told earlier. Zach freely admits that he lied to Derrick about Nicole being the cause of Victoria's current melt down. He told a little lie. And he told her all about everyone's alliances. But he never meant any harm. He really didn't mean to throw Derrick under the bus. Really, he was just telling Victoria about his game. What is all the drama about?
The house meeting fizzles out, and the guys are left to do some damage control. They concoct some crazy plan for Zach to say he made up all the alliances he revealed in his confession. Another perfect, no fail, plan by the best worst alliance in all of BB. Seriously, these guys spend hours together talking game and think that nobody will ever suspect them of working together. Their alliances have been outed how many times?
Meanwhile, Frankie starts a little drama of his own. Frankie learns that Nicole told people that he said he will have Victoria in his back pocket after he reels her in with his famous sister. Frankie did say this. But he acts like this is a direct insult to his sister. He says that there is an army of Ariana fans who will take care of Nicole. He is very upset about this, and works himself into a mini hissy fit. Nicole is now his number one target.
Derrick snaps to attention and assures Frankie that he doesn't even speak his sisters name in the diary room. It's so damn weird. Are there rules about famous people I don't know about? Are we not allowed to talk about them? Isn't the whole point of being famous having people talk about you?
Frankie says he doesn't want to start any drama. He sighs, and pouts, and looks like he is gonna cry. Derrick tells him nobody is gonna talk trash about his sister. Frankie says they better not! He does his best to look completely pitiful. He tells Derrick he is okay, he doesn't want any drama. Then he heads to the diary room to place an emergency call to the Famous Police, to press charges against Nicole.
Have a Dorky Day!!
Then the tears begin. Victoria is always crying to someone about something. And while she is crying she keeps repeating that she doesn't want to start any drama. But people are horrible, she is disgusted, everyone is so mean! She wants to self evict!!! But seriously, she doesn't want to cause any drama.
Last night, the drama she doesn't want to cause is all about Derrick. He betrayed her! It feels like he cheated on her! She doesn't want to be here anymore. She needs to talk to Zach one more time, so that she can be upset all over again. Maybe if she cries to him about her broken heart, she can be sure there won't be any drama! And maybe Derrick will find out how much she wants to avoid drama, and he will come talk to her!
Well, what could be more dramatic than a house meeting? Everyone but Christine and Donny gather in the HOH room to confront Zach about a little lie he told earlier. Zach freely admits that he lied to Derrick about Nicole being the cause of Victoria's current melt down. He told a little lie. And he told her all about everyone's alliances. But he never meant any harm. He really didn't mean to throw Derrick under the bus. Really, he was just telling Victoria about his game. What is all the drama about?
The house meeting fizzles out, and the guys are left to do some damage control. They concoct some crazy plan for Zach to say he made up all the alliances he revealed in his confession. Another perfect, no fail, plan by the best worst alliance in all of BB. Seriously, these guys spend hours together talking game and think that nobody will ever suspect them of working together. Their alliances have been outed how many times?
Meanwhile, Frankie starts a little drama of his own. Frankie learns that Nicole told people that he said he will have Victoria in his back pocket after he reels her in with his famous sister. Frankie did say this. But he acts like this is a direct insult to his sister. He says that there is an army of Ariana fans who will take care of Nicole. He is very upset about this, and works himself into a mini hissy fit. Nicole is now his number one target.
Derrick snaps to attention and assures Frankie that he doesn't even speak his sisters name in the diary room. It's so damn weird. Are there rules about famous people I don't know about? Are we not allowed to talk about them? Isn't the whole point of being famous having people talk about you?
Frankie says he doesn't want to start any drama. He sighs, and pouts, and looks like he is gonna cry. Derrick tells him nobody is gonna talk trash about his sister. Frankie says they better not! He does his best to look completely pitiful. He tells Derrick he is okay, he doesn't want any drama. Then he heads to the diary room to place an emergency call to the Famous Police, to press charges against Nicole.
Have a Dorky Day!!
Saturday, August 9, 2014
My Name Is Frankie Grande And I Am A Mogulomaniac
The plan was in place to get Frankie on the block. Caleb would throw the Battle of The Block, he and Frankie would lose to Donny and Zach, and it's a done deal. A perfect plan, unless one or one hundred things go wrong! The feeds go down, and the battle begins.
Hours later, when the feeds return, we discover that Frankie won the Battle of the Block, all by his lonesome!. Plus, he won a field trip to a football game for himself, Caleb, and Christine! And he won a slop pass! Things quickly spiral out of control from there. Another night of crazy good feeds.
The kind of feeds that make you want to smash your computer to smithereens every time Frankie opens his mouth. Because when Frankie speaks, the feeling of disgust and outrage at his words makes you cringe. You want to look away, but you can't. Ugh.
Frankie had informed everyone in the house that he would be talking to them later about... um...things. He dropped cryptic hints all day about this. After the comp he would tell them...umm..things..um...good things....about...ummm...stuff...about why he is there.....and things!
And tell he did! But first, after he tries unsuccessfully to get Zach to talk with him, he annouces that he may have to get production to lock Zach in a room by himself if he isn't going to behave. He doesn't want Zach to ruin his talk with everyone.. He actually says this. Then, as he gathers the guys together to move into the fire room, a sulking but quiet Zach included, he says this:
"Producers! We are moving into the fire room!"
When they all get settled into he room he says this:
"Are the cameras in place?"
And with those words, it is obvious to all of us feed watchers around the world, that this is the beginning of yet another segment of The Frankie Show, sponsored by BB production. What follows is one of the most disgusting confessionals in BB history. He tells Caleb, Derrick, Cody, and Zach that he has been lying to them the entire game. He wants to tell them who he really is. And then he says this:
" I am social media mogul, a YouTube star with a gazillion followers, and my sister is a mega-super pop star, and I am here to donate my winnings to charity, my charity that I founded, to build schools in Africa"
And things go downhill from there. Down the hill we go in a big, slimy, egotistical mudslide designed to wash away all of Frankie's sins. Thus begins a night of shock and awe that throws the house guests into pandemonium. Complete with Frankie sending us to fish every fifteen minutes as he burst into song. An Ariana Grande song to be precise. He also warns the hgs that he can say Ariana's name, but they are not allowed. WTF??
To insure the sympathy votes were secure, he threw his grandfathers death into the mix as the reason he betrayed Zach and the alliance! If I was a real live BB update blogger, I would have to transcribe all of the ridiculously arrogant words he uttered last night. Thank gawd I am just a dorky little blogger with no such responsibility. I leave that to the professionals. And may gawd bless and protect those poor souls who had to listen, and re-listen, to his sniveling drivel to get the words right. Please pray for them. Amen.
I am still stuck on his first words about being an internet mogul. Who says that? I consult my resident expert on all things pertaining to the English language. I ask her if anyone would ever refer to themselves as a mogul.? Is that the proper use of the word? She says no. It's a word that someone might use to describe you, but you would never use it to describe yourself. Unless you were maybe Donald Trump. HA!
So we had a long night of star struck hgs pretending not to care a damn about who Frankie and his sister are. Caleb couldn't hide his starry eyes as he tells Frankie that in the game he doesn't care who Frankie is, but after the show can Frankie hook him up?
Frankie responds by scheduling a limo to take everyone to Justin Bieber's house. I don't know if that will happen before everyone gets to sing on his sister's next double-triple-platinum-single, or after they all attend the My-Sister-Is-One-Level-Above-Beyonce Award Show. And somewhere in the Frankie Tour schedule, he simply must pencil in his next YouTube video, which of course they will all be starring in. Seriously, I am pretty sure all this is in the works!
It's a monkey-barrel of emotions in the BB house by now. Nicole is crying her eyes out because she is the one who nommed Frankie. She now believes she will be seen as a villain. She is completely freaking out about this. Remember her fake fight with Hayden, and how she broke down and said she couldn't do it because viewers would think she was mean? Nicole worries about how she is perceived, and all this famous Frankie business just makes her want to curl up and cry.
Vicroria has a little cry-fest of her own involving her mysterious hair loss, Frankie, and his sister. It turns out that Ariana lost her hair tooooooooo!! And when Victoria had a meltdown about her extensions being revealed on BB, Frankie comforted her, and mentioned his sister had the same thing happen to her hair. But he didn't say his sister was FAMOUS! He didn't tell her she was ARIANA GRANDE! And for some crazy reason, this breaks Victoria's heart.
While Victoria and Nicole are busy giving each other pep-talks, the guys are plotting.the next best move of the worst ever BB alliance. They never give up. Derrick is working overtime now. He has to get these guys motivated. Zach has been in a stupor since Frankie revealed his super-hero powers. He keeps saying "He's building schools in Africa dude, I'm fooked!"
Frankie announces that he will be sleeping in the HOH room so that everybody can have their own bed tonight. Once again he is doing things for the good of all. Such sacrifices he makes!
I just can't take it any more!! I finally turn off the feeds around 1:00 a.m. BB time. I am already dreading the next few CBS shows. Frankie has ruined them with his confessional. And now the feeds will be filled with Frankie name dropping, and singing, and all kinds of Frankie show business talk. Ugh, and double ugh!!
As I reach to click the feeds off I catch this little tidbit. Frankie walks through the dining area with his bag packed for his move to the HOH room. He is on his way to take a bubble bath and relax in HOH luxury.
Christine and Cody are talking, and doing their flirty thing, and Frankie stops to chat and recap his day:
"Wow! Were noms just this morning?? Today I was nommed, I was shunned all day, I kicked ass in the competition and won it all by myself, and I won a field trip to a football game. And now I am the most popular girl in the house!!!"
It's a crazy world, this BB world! And tonight, on the feeds, Frankie gave us a guided tour of it's dark underbelly. I know we have long days ahead filled with conspiracy theories of production manipulating things for Frankie's benefit. I have my own theory that most of tonight's festivities were a direct result of Frankie manipulating production. But hey, that's show business! ((curls up in fetal position and remains catatonic for the rest of the season))
Have a Dorky Day!
Hours later, when the feeds return, we discover that Frankie won the Battle of the Block, all by his lonesome!. Plus, he won a field trip to a football game for himself, Caleb, and Christine! And he won a slop pass! Things quickly spiral out of control from there. Another night of crazy good feeds.
The kind of feeds that make you want to smash your computer to smithereens every time Frankie opens his mouth. Because when Frankie speaks, the feeling of disgust and outrage at his words makes you cringe. You want to look away, but you can't. Ugh.
Frankie had informed everyone in the house that he would be talking to them later about... um...things. He dropped cryptic hints all day about this. After the comp he would tell them...umm..things..um...good things....about...ummm...stuff...about why he is there.....and things!
And tell he did! But first, after he tries unsuccessfully to get Zach to talk with him, he annouces that he may have to get production to lock Zach in a room by himself if he isn't going to behave. He doesn't want Zach to ruin his talk with everyone.. He actually says this. Then, as he gathers the guys together to move into the fire room, a sulking but quiet Zach included, he says this:
"Producers! We are moving into the fire room!"
When they all get settled into he room he says this:
"Are the cameras in place?"
And with those words, it is obvious to all of us feed watchers around the world, that this is the beginning of yet another segment of The Frankie Show, sponsored by BB production. What follows is one of the most disgusting confessionals in BB history. He tells Caleb, Derrick, Cody, and Zach that he has been lying to them the entire game. He wants to tell them who he really is. And then he says this:
" I am social media mogul, a YouTube star with a gazillion followers, and my sister is a mega-super pop star, and I am here to donate my winnings to charity, my charity that I founded, to build schools in Africa"
And things go downhill from there. Down the hill we go in a big, slimy, egotistical mudslide designed to wash away all of Frankie's sins. Thus begins a night of shock and awe that throws the house guests into pandemonium. Complete with Frankie sending us to fish every fifteen minutes as he burst into song. An Ariana Grande song to be precise. He also warns the hgs that he can say Ariana's name, but they are not allowed. WTF??
To insure the sympathy votes were secure, he threw his grandfathers death into the mix as the reason he betrayed Zach and the alliance! If I was a real live BB update blogger, I would have to transcribe all of the ridiculously arrogant words he uttered last night. Thank gawd I am just a dorky little blogger with no such responsibility. I leave that to the professionals. And may gawd bless and protect those poor souls who had to listen, and re-listen, to his sniveling drivel to get the words right. Please pray for them. Amen.
I am still stuck on his first words about being an internet mogul. Who says that? I consult my resident expert on all things pertaining to the English language. I ask her if anyone would ever refer to themselves as a mogul.? Is that the proper use of the word? She says no. It's a word that someone might use to describe you, but you would never use it to describe yourself. Unless you were maybe Donald Trump. HA!
So we had a long night of star struck hgs pretending not to care a damn about who Frankie and his sister are. Caleb couldn't hide his starry eyes as he tells Frankie that in the game he doesn't care who Frankie is, but after the show can Frankie hook him up?
Frankie responds by scheduling a limo to take everyone to Justin Bieber's house. I don't know if that will happen before everyone gets to sing on his sister's next double-triple-platinum-single, or after they all attend the My-Sister-Is-One-Level-Above-Beyonce Award Show. And somewhere in the Frankie Tour schedule, he simply must pencil in his next YouTube video, which of course they will all be starring in. Seriously, I am pretty sure all this is in the works!
It's a monkey-barrel of emotions in the BB house by now. Nicole is crying her eyes out because she is the one who nommed Frankie. She now believes she will be seen as a villain. She is completely freaking out about this. Remember her fake fight with Hayden, and how she broke down and said she couldn't do it because viewers would think she was mean? Nicole worries about how she is perceived, and all this famous Frankie business just makes her want to curl up and cry.
Vicroria has a little cry-fest of her own involving her mysterious hair loss, Frankie, and his sister. It turns out that Ariana lost her hair tooooooooo!! And when Victoria had a meltdown about her extensions being revealed on BB, Frankie comforted her, and mentioned his sister had the same thing happen to her hair. But he didn't say his sister was FAMOUS! He didn't tell her she was ARIANA GRANDE! And for some crazy reason, this breaks Victoria's heart.
While Victoria and Nicole are busy giving each other pep-talks, the guys are plotting.the next best move of the worst ever BB alliance. They never give up. Derrick is working overtime now. He has to get these guys motivated. Zach has been in a stupor since Frankie revealed his super-hero powers. He keeps saying "He's building schools in Africa dude, I'm fooked!"
Frankie announces that he will be sleeping in the HOH room so that everybody can have their own bed tonight. Once again he is doing things for the good of all. Such sacrifices he makes!
I just can't take it any more!! I finally turn off the feeds around 1:00 a.m. BB time. I am already dreading the next few CBS shows. Frankie has ruined them with his confessional. And now the feeds will be filled with Frankie name dropping, and singing, and all kinds of Frankie show business talk. Ugh, and double ugh!!
As I reach to click the feeds off I catch this little tidbit. Frankie walks through the dining area with his bag packed for his move to the HOH room. He is on his way to take a bubble bath and relax in HOH luxury.
Christine and Cody are talking, and doing their flirty thing, and Frankie stops to chat and recap his day:
"Wow! Were noms just this morning?? Today I was nommed, I was shunned all day, I kicked ass in the competition and won it all by myself, and I won a field trip to a football game. And now I am the most popular girl in the house!!!"
It's a crazy world, this BB world! And tonight, on the feeds, Frankie gave us a guided tour of it's dark underbelly. I know we have long days ahead filled with conspiracy theories of production manipulating things for Frankie's benefit. I have my own theory that most of tonight's festivities were a direct result of Frankie manipulating production. But hey, that's show business! ((curls up in fetal position and remains catatonic for the rest of the season))
Have a Dorky Day!
Saturday, July 19, 2014
Victoria, What Did You Do???
I was suspicious last night when we had fish for a while, and then all 4 cams were on the hive room. As I watched the convo between Caleb and Amber go on into infinity, I was hoping that the cam shenanigans meant that Victoria was self evicting. She had been crying and complaining to everyone since the Battle of the Block. She says everyone in the house is so mean, and she is so nice, she doesn't even want to be here anymore. I never heard her actually threaten to self evict, but it was fun to think about.
Quite a while later Zach is up in the HOH with Frankie and Cody in the bird nest. Zach says they have to keep Victoria, especially after what went down today. What is he talking about? What went down? Frankie and Cody are as clueless as I am. Zach tells them he can't talk about it, but it was something Victoria did in the diary room that you cannot do. What could that be? He can't tell them because production said not to tell or he would be in trouble. Something that she did, that you cannot do, that might cause someone in production to lose their job!!! Whaaaaaat? Tell me! Tell me!!
We get fish, and then..new topic! No more mention of Victoria. What happened? I want to know!!! Will we ever know?? Did anything even really happen? Zach is great at making things up, so he may be lying to them. Victoria is an emotional mess right now, so she may be making a big deal about nothing. Zach told Frankie and Cody that he went right into the diary room after talking to Victoria and asked them if it was true. He made it sound like they said yes, then warned him not to talk about it to anyone. ( 7/19 2:03:33 am )
So frustrating!! I search the archives and find a really quick exchange between Victoria and Zach that begins in the kitchen ( 7/18 6:01:12 pm ) Victoria is crying, they go to the storage room, Victoria says "Do you know why they called me to the DR? It wasn't..." And we get fish. It wasn't what??? What happened?
I can't even imagine any crazy scenarios. What in the world could she do in the diary room that might affect somebodys job? The guys have been complaining about Victoria touching them inappropriately. They can't really believe Victoria has no idea what she is doing. Maybe they talked about it in the diary room and production decided to address the issue with her. But still, what could she do in there that you are not allowed to do? Demonstrate her technique? No, that can't be it, Zach said it had to do with the game.What happened in there???
The diary room is such an enigma. What goes on in there? Remember last season? When were were all certain that Elissa was receiving the full spa treatment during her hour long diary room sessions? What could she have been doing in there for hours at a time?
Jocasta revealed a bit about the diary room yesterday. She was talking to Brittany, who was complaining again about being a target and blah blah blah. She said she just wanted to scream, Jocasta told her to go do that in the DR. She told Britt to just go in there and let it all out, and they will ask her if she wants it filmed or not, and just say no. Jocasta says that's what she does. She goes in there all the time and lets loose and tells them not to film it. Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!
The DR is our secret weapon. Our sacred ground! DR sessions help us separate the truth from the lies. A diary room rant or melt down is our dream come true. We want to see you let loose. Slam the whole house! Cry us a river! My whole BB world is spiraling out of control! No, Jocasta, say it ain't so!
Have a Dorky Day!
Quite a while later Zach is up in the HOH with Frankie and Cody in the bird nest. Zach says they have to keep Victoria, especially after what went down today. What is he talking about? What went down? Frankie and Cody are as clueless as I am. Zach tells them he can't talk about it, but it was something Victoria did in the diary room that you cannot do. What could that be? He can't tell them because production said not to tell or he would be in trouble. Something that she did, that you cannot do, that might cause someone in production to lose their job!!! Whaaaaaat? Tell me! Tell me!!
We get fish, and then..new topic! No more mention of Victoria. What happened? I want to know!!! Will we ever know?? Did anything even really happen? Zach is great at making things up, so he may be lying to them. Victoria is an emotional mess right now, so she may be making a big deal about nothing. Zach told Frankie and Cody that he went right into the diary room after talking to Victoria and asked them if it was true. He made it sound like they said yes, then warned him not to talk about it to anyone. ( 7/19 2:03:33 am )
So frustrating!! I search the archives and find a really quick exchange between Victoria and Zach that begins in the kitchen ( 7/18 6:01:12 pm ) Victoria is crying, they go to the storage room, Victoria says "Do you know why they called me to the DR? It wasn't..." And we get fish. It wasn't what??? What happened?
I can't even imagine any crazy scenarios. What in the world could she do in the diary room that might affect somebodys job? The guys have been complaining about Victoria touching them inappropriately. They can't really believe Victoria has no idea what she is doing. Maybe they talked about it in the diary room and production decided to address the issue with her. But still, what could she do in there that you are not allowed to do? Demonstrate her technique? No, that can't be it, Zach said it had to do with the game.What happened in there???
The diary room is such an enigma. What goes on in there? Remember last season? When were were all certain that Elissa was receiving the full spa treatment during her hour long diary room sessions? What could she have been doing in there for hours at a time?
Jocasta revealed a bit about the diary room yesterday. She was talking to Brittany, who was complaining again about being a target and blah blah blah. She said she just wanted to scream, Jocasta told her to go do that in the DR. She told Britt to just go in there and let it all out, and they will ask her if she wants it filmed or not, and just say no. Jocasta says that's what she does. She goes in there all the time and lets loose and tells them not to film it. Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!
The DR is our secret weapon. Our sacred ground! DR sessions help us separate the truth from the lies. A diary room rant or melt down is our dream come true. We want to see you let loose. Slam the whole house! Cry us a river! My whole BB world is spiraling out of control! No, Jocasta, say it ain't so!
Have a Dorky Day!
Friday, July 18, 2014
I'm Confused....Again!
Week four of BB16 begins with me completely lost when the feeds return after the show. The house guests are all talking about the amazing HOH comp. Wait..whut? The egg comp is the most fun, exciting, amazing comp they have ever seen! There were more details discussed about this comp than any comp so far this season. Maybe in all the history of BB! Each comp duo replays their egg strategy over and over. I am so confused!!!
Did I watch the wrong show? The wrong comp? Because it looked to me like the same silly egg and chicken wire comp we have seen before. It's not fun. It's awkward and difficult and kind of boring to watch. Did the partner twist make it more fun? They just keep saying how much damn fun that comp was. I don't get it.
Then Frankie races from room to room screaming about how excited he is that he won HOH. He jumps up on everyone and hugs them! He is sooooooooooo happy. Ridiculously happy. Obnoxiously happy. Shut up already happy. This confuses me even more. Didn't Cody win too? Don't they still have to do the Battle of the Block? Didn't Frankie already win an HOH comp the first week? Like 3 weeks ago? Why is he so excited now?
Then Team America starts talking about their new challenge to nominate a strong competitor. They hatch a plot to say that they believe Amber to be a really strong competitor, but she won't be their real target. They wonder aloud if America will buy it. I may be confused, but I'm not buying it, are you?
Talk turns to Victoria, and I feel a little better. It turns out all the hgs are confused about Victoria. Me too! The boys are seriously confused, because Victoria keeps cuddling them and causing them to get..um..let's say..um.. excited. They can't believe she has no idea what she is doing. She says that, for religious reasons, she cannot sleep in the same room with a man. But she has been climbing into bed and cuddling with almost every guy in the house!
They discuss sleeping arrangements, and how Victoria now says she could sleep in a room with Cody, but not any other guy. The house guests just scratch their heads and seem even more confused. It is clear that no one wants to sleep in the same bed as Victoria. She gropes them in her sleep! She climbs on top of them, rearranges their bodies to suit her cuddle needs, and then touches them all over!!! All in her sleep!
Meanwhile, Caleb is basking in his live show afterglow. He says that the whole time he was sitting in the nomination chair he felt so good that nothing could bother him. It didn't even matter what Devin said in his speech, because Caleb had his shirt unbuttoned, and his abs were on national television! Beast mode cowboy abs!
Caleb's abs shine like a beacon through the fog of my confusion. I revisit the sense of clarity I was experiencing before the feeds came back on. Back when I was basking in my own afterglow, laughing to myself about THE BEST HOME VISIT EVER with Donny's family. This cast may confuse me, but they sure are fun to watch!
Have a Dorky Day!
Did I watch the wrong show? The wrong comp? Because it looked to me like the same silly egg and chicken wire comp we have seen before. It's not fun. It's awkward and difficult and kind of boring to watch. Did the partner twist make it more fun? They just keep saying how much damn fun that comp was. I don't get it.
Then Frankie races from room to room screaming about how excited he is that he won HOH. He jumps up on everyone and hugs them! He is sooooooooooo happy. Ridiculously happy. Obnoxiously happy. Shut up already happy. This confuses me even more. Didn't Cody win too? Don't they still have to do the Battle of the Block? Didn't Frankie already win an HOH comp the first week? Like 3 weeks ago? Why is he so excited now?
Then Team America starts talking about their new challenge to nominate a strong competitor. They hatch a plot to say that they believe Amber to be a really strong competitor, but she won't be their real target. They wonder aloud if America will buy it. I may be confused, but I'm not buying it, are you?
Talk turns to Victoria, and I feel a little better. It turns out all the hgs are confused about Victoria. Me too! The boys are seriously confused, because Victoria keeps cuddling them and causing them to get..um..let's say..um.. excited. They can't believe she has no idea what she is doing. She says that, for religious reasons, she cannot sleep in the same room with a man. But she has been climbing into bed and cuddling with almost every guy in the house!
They discuss sleeping arrangements, and how Victoria now says she could sleep in a room with Cody, but not any other guy. The house guests just scratch their heads and seem even more confused. It is clear that no one wants to sleep in the same bed as Victoria. She gropes them in her sleep! She climbs on top of them, rearranges their bodies to suit her cuddle needs, and then touches them all over!!! All in her sleep!
Meanwhile, Caleb is basking in his live show afterglow. He says that the whole time he was sitting in the nomination chair he felt so good that nothing could bother him. It didn't even matter what Devin said in his speech, because Caleb had his shirt unbuttoned, and his abs were on national television! Beast mode cowboy abs!
Caleb's abs shine like a beacon through the fog of my confusion. I revisit the sense of clarity I was experiencing before the feeds came back on. Back when I was basking in my own afterglow, laughing to myself about THE BEST HOME VISIT EVER with Donny's family. This cast may confuse me, but they sure are fun to watch!
Have a Dorky Day!
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