Have we ever had this many potential train wrecks so early in the season? Like week one early? All on separate tracks, departing from different stations, destined to derail in whatever the hell universe they are speeding through?
Joey's train just keeps on crashing. It doesn't realize it has already gone up in flames. Three times already! Last night she hopped on her train for a fourth time and did a repeat performance of Alex. This character is her new campaign manager, and his main job seems to be to scare the living daylights out of the other house guests.
There has been some talk that Alex is a task assigned to Joey as the first member of Team America. If that's the case, we should call her locomotive the Grodner Crazy Train, because absolutely no good can come of this. At least Joey's wreckage doesn't have any real impact on any of the other players.
Caleb and Devin's trains have huge monster engines that can smash right through mountains. Separate trains, but the same Bomb Squad passengers. Both monster trains have the potential to destroy the games of their alliance members. Caleb and Devin seem to have each other's back, but they rarely think about the safety of the other bombers. And they have no idea they are riding separate trains.
Caleb's train has a special car for Amber. He is still decorating it. I hope Amber makes it to the Greyhound station in time to make her escape! He claims he will wait till after the HOH comp to invite her join him in that car, so that she can maybe apologize to him. But I don't think that train is gonna wait for HOH. You can see the smoke coming out of his ears. That train is ready to roll!
Meanwhile, the other house guests line up for tickets to watch the fun. Even as the Bomb Squad members fear they may be outed by the coming train wrecks, they squeal with delight at the thought of such a glorious spectacle. Frankie and Zach are so excited they are pinching each others nipples!
I love a good train wreck. But I kinda like this cast, so I am sending them a care package of helmets and tutus. The helmets will protect them from the shrapnel, while the tutus act as a diversion. They best put them on right now!
Have a Dorky Day
Showing posts with label JoeyVanPelt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label JoeyVanPelt. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 2, 2014
Sunday, June 29, 2014
Joey Van Pelt: BB16 Union President (and Sole Member)
Oh my goodness gracious! BB newbies are lovely and fine. But a newbie who knows nothing about the game can really dig her own grave all the way to China, can't she? Joey has a plan. A completely ridiculous plan, doomed to failure from the get go. A plan that somehow includes transparency and invisibility cloaks.A plan she explains in great detail to every house guest, even as they wield a ten foot pole and beat a hasty retreat.
But I think I know where Joey is coming from. It's not just that she is a newbie who knows nothing about the game. I suspect we are seeing a direct result of what Caleb and Frankie must have done when they had to nominate the first 4 house guests. We haven't seen that footage yet. But they obviously teamed up and made nice because they are now spooning in the HOH bird nest every night.
My theory is that they concocted the first of many "no blood on their hands" plans to select the nominations. They chose the first 4 to drop in the HOH comps. Then, they announced to everyone why they picked those people, explaining how this HOH is all about being fair.
When Donny wins the POV comp, Caleb makes the rounds of the hg's, explaining how his choice of a replacement will be fair. He tells them he will nom whomever the house desires. But that's not the real plan. Caleb is going to nominate Joey no matter what the others say. He will just make everyone think that Joey is the house choice to be nominated, and evicted.
It's all about more fairness and less blood. But Joey figures it out. She's pretty smart for a seriously dumb newbie. Since the house has been following the "let's be fair about it" rule up to this point, she sees no reason why an unfair nomination should be allowed. In her eyes, the fair nomination is Devin. He creeps all the girls out, (and a few of the guys ), he's had a couple meltdowns already, he's a threat to everyone in comps, and he eats all the food!! Not only should he be nominated, he should evicted!! Sounds fair to me.
She explains this over and over again to people all night long. And since she is all for fairness, well, she has to tell Devin he needs to go. She wants him to hear it from her. In our eyes, all of this is pure lunacy. One of the most stupid pre-nomination campaigns in the history of Big Brother. The house guests are feeling the same. Any votes she had to stay have shriveled up and died a horrible death.
But Joey is only following the rules the HOH lovebirds have presented to her. Fair is fair. She charters a bus for yet another door to door survey. Hasn't anyone read the BB16 union bylaws? Isn't this administration run on the transparency guidelines for fairness in the Big Brother game?? Have you paid your union dues to be hoodwinked into unjust nominations?
The results of her endless polling only help to galvanize her activism on this issue. Pretty much everyone tells her she that she makes a good point, they will think about it, and they really don't want her to go.Of course, since this is Big Brother, they are all lying to her face! But in Joey's fantasy world of fairness, the data she has collected convinces her she must be right. Devin is the fair choice. So be it.
So that's my theory. I could be wrong, I usually am. She may simply be a complete idiot. Well, even if I am right, she is acting like an idiot as far as game goes. But what else can a blue headed newbie do?
Have a Dorky Day
But I think I know where Joey is coming from. It's not just that she is a newbie who knows nothing about the game. I suspect we are seeing a direct result of what Caleb and Frankie must have done when they had to nominate the first 4 house guests. We haven't seen that footage yet. But they obviously teamed up and made nice because they are now spooning in the HOH bird nest every night.
My theory is that they concocted the first of many "no blood on their hands" plans to select the nominations. They chose the first 4 to drop in the HOH comps. Then, they announced to everyone why they picked those people, explaining how this HOH is all about being fair.
When Donny wins the POV comp, Caleb makes the rounds of the hg's, explaining how his choice of a replacement will be fair. He tells them he will nom whomever the house desires. But that's not the real plan. Caleb is going to nominate Joey no matter what the others say. He will just make everyone think that Joey is the house choice to be nominated, and evicted.
It's all about more fairness and less blood. But Joey figures it out. She's pretty smart for a seriously dumb newbie. Since the house has been following the "let's be fair about it" rule up to this point, she sees no reason why an unfair nomination should be allowed. In her eyes, the fair nomination is Devin. He creeps all the girls out, (and a few of the guys ), he's had a couple meltdowns already, he's a threat to everyone in comps, and he eats all the food!! Not only should he be nominated, he should evicted!! Sounds fair to me.
She explains this over and over again to people all night long. And since she is all for fairness, well, she has to tell Devin he needs to go. She wants him to hear it from her. In our eyes, all of this is pure lunacy. One of the most stupid pre-nomination campaigns in the history of Big Brother. The house guests are feeling the same. Any votes she had to stay have shriveled up and died a horrible death.
But Joey is only following the rules the HOH lovebirds have presented to her. Fair is fair. She charters a bus for yet another door to door survey. Hasn't anyone read the BB16 union bylaws? Isn't this administration run on the transparency guidelines for fairness in the Big Brother game?? Have you paid your union dues to be hoodwinked into unjust nominations?
The results of her endless polling only help to galvanize her activism on this issue. Pretty much everyone tells her she that she makes a good point, they will think about it, and they really don't want her to go.Of course, since this is Big Brother, they are all lying to her face! But in Joey's fantasy world of fairness, the data she has collected convinces her she must be right. Devin is the fair choice. So be it.
So that's my theory. I could be wrong, I usually am. She may simply be a complete idiot. Well, even if I am right, she is acting like an idiot as far as game goes. But what else can a blue headed newbie do?
Have a Dorky Day
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